"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > The Back Porch > Off Topic Discussions
Click Here to Login
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 09-07-2008, 02:40 PM   #1
Senior Cook
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Madison, Wisconsin
Posts: 244
Just making myself miserable.

I have an old friend who used to live in our area, and moved about 75 miles away.

In one breath I say "old friend," and in the next breath I regret he didn't move even farther away.

Now, you might find this odd coming from me who can actually quote the proper etiquette for knife fighting, but he has no social skills. He cannot read the moods of people in the room, he stays up very late, and once in your home he will not go away. When I hear he's coming, I resent it, and even make excuses if possible.

I haven't seen him in a while, he has knives here that need service, and I do owe him a visit. However, on any other Sunday I would have slept late, gone to the gym and then ridden my Harley. Now I'm sitting here watching the driveway. Even the mutts sense I'm not very happy.

My wife's health is on and off, and for the moment she feels fine. She's out running errands with my SIL. But like most folks, she over does it when on a high, and I know she'll play herself out later today. Then she'll try to be a good host when I know she feels ill and my friend won't go home.

He's bringing his POSILQ, and she doesn't have any more sense than he does. You could hit her with a 2x4 and I doubt you'd get her attention, although I feel like trying it at times.

Instead of happily being on the highway, I'm pacing in my house grumbling and googling "voodoo dolls." Now granted, I live a tad different that most folks here, but what do you do when you're roped into an impossible situation?

__________________

Chico Buller is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 02:50 PM   #2
Chef Extraordinaire
 
pacanis's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: NW PA
Posts: 18,751
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chico Buller View Post
,,,, but what do you do when you're roped into an impossible situation?
Same as you.
Voodoo dolls.

__________________

__________________
Give us this day our daily bacon.
pacanis is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 02:57 PM   #3
Head Chef
 
Join Date: May 2007
Location: VA
Posts: 1,218
be honest .. talk for a bit .. then thank him for coming by ...
its time for your wife and yourself to retire for the evening ..
and tell him next time you will come see him ..
then goodbye .. close the door ..
love2"Q" is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 03:04 PM   #4
Chef Extraordinaire
 
kitchenelf's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 19,725
Send a message via MSN to kitchenelf
Sometimes we have to do these things. It's one moment in time you have to give up. It's called selflessness.
__________________
kitchenelf

"Count yourself...you ain't so many" - quote from Buck's Daddy
kitchenelf is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 03:35 PM   #5
Senior Cook
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Madison, Wisconsin
Posts: 244
Good thoughts, thank you.

But I was a good boy for most of my working life. This is my time, and I should be able to use it as I wish. Otherwise, what's the use of being a good boy and building a home.

It is going to be a very short night. In fact, before he get's here, I'm going to sharpen his knife to guarantee that.
Chico Buller is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 04:20 PM   #6
Head Chef
 
Adillo303's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Haledon, New Jersey
Posts: 1,072
Send a message via AIM to Adillo303
Seems to me that you should have hopped in your Harley and gone his way. Then, you are in control. Besides, you would have had a good ride.

AC

BTW - What is a POSILQ?
__________________
One difference between a cook and a chef is that the cook mows the lawn, while the bread is rising.
Adillo303 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 04:35 PM   #7
Traveling Welcome Wagon
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Somewhere, US
Posts: 15,716
He obviously doesn't take a hint, so don't rely on him to catch your signals that it is time for him to go. Let him know before he even comes that you only have a certain amount of time to take care of business (set an ending time). Serve one round of refreshments, make a little small-talk, but keep it mostly to business.

Barbara
Barbara L is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 05:51 PM   #8
Sous Chef
 
Silversage's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 962
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adillo303 View Post

BTW - What is a POSILQ?
POSSLQ - US Census Bureau term for "Persons of Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters". If I remember right, they coined the acronym during the 1970's or 80's (perhaps for the 1980 census?).
Silversage is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 05:54 PM   #9
Chief Eating Officer
 
GB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA,Massachusetts
Posts: 25,509
So what does the "I" stand for?
__________________
You know you can't resist clicking
this link. Your eyes will thank you. VISUAL BLISS
GB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 06:04 PM   #10
Traveling Welcome Wagon
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Somewhere, US
Posts: 15,716
Interesting. I had never seen that acronym before, so I just looked it up, and the I should just be another S, for POSSLQ.

Barbara
Barbara L is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 06:17 PM   #11
Master Chef
 
luvs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: da 'burgh
Posts: 9,674
prop your eyelids open with toothpicks & put on your robe, yawn plenty, like carol brunette.
__________________
i believe that life would not be complete sans comfy 'ol tee-shirts, the Golden Girls, and the color pink
& rock on, PITTSBURGH-
luvs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 07:22 PM   #12
Sous Chef
 
smoke king's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: elkhorn, ne
Posts: 984
Chico, I have no advice to lend. But I have to tell you, reading your posts always puts a smile on my face. You should write a book.

You are truly the Garrison Keilor (or G. Gordon Liddy?) of DC.

Please, keep em' comin!!!
smoke king is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 07:29 PM   #13
Master Chef
 
texasgirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: North Texas
Posts: 9,497
I'm with love2q, sit a while, talk about your interest and then tell them, well, it was good to see, but, my wife is tired and she needs rest. I don't know what is wrong with her, maybe I missed it somewhere, but, by your posts, I don't think it's a cold. So, he either has morals and leaves when he knows it's time, or, you will know not to let him come over again, lol or, do as Adillo says, you go to his house and leave when you are ready, that way, you get your ride too
texasgirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 07:33 PM   #14
Chief Eating Officer
 
GB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA,Massachusetts
Posts: 25,509
It might sound corny, but honesty is the best policy. It might not be the easiest policy, but it is the only way to get your needs addressed correctly. Tell your guest that you would love to have him over, but you need to call it a night by x o'clock. Direct honesty is the best way to go.
__________________
You know you can't resist clicking
this link. Your eyes will thank you. VISUAL BLISS
GB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 07:40 PM   #15
Head Chef
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,783
I've tried honesty, but some people just don't get it. Set limits. Tell your friend you have an appt or place to go at a certain time. Walk them to the door & to their car. I have a few friends that wont let me off the phone, talk for hours, & call every day. One 'got it' when I was honest. The other friend, well, had to give them a time limit & politely cut them off.
*amy* is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 07:42 PM   #16
Chief Eating Officer
 
GB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA,Massachusetts
Posts: 25,509
Why can't you be honest while giving a time limit??? Say you can't make this an all night affair so the night needs to end at x o'clock. There is no reason honesty can not be part of the equation.
__________________
You know you can't resist clicking
this link. Your eyes will thank you. VISUAL BLISS
GB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 08:06 PM   #17
Master Chef
 
luvs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: da 'burgh
Posts: 9,674
i agree, in sincerity. you can gently say, 'goodnite. it's way past our bedtime & we've work tomorrow. 'nite, thanks fer joining us, we'll see you soon."

we've a buddy that talks incessantly, & he spends his night here when we visit with him, so you gotta kinda brush him off, i wait till jake says, "well, man, we're gonna try to get sleep fer tomorrow. i'm gonna work."
__________________
i believe that life would not be complete sans comfy 'ol tee-shirts, the Golden Girls, and the color pink
& rock on, PITTSBURGH-
luvs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 08:19 PM   #18
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Collier County, Fl.
Posts: 4,198
I'm with smoke king & Stacey.
Tell him he' s HIGH MAINTENENCE and that you love the guy, but just don't always have the energy, as things in your own life need that energy more.
And then get down to writing that book.
quicksilver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 09:09 PM   #19
Head Chef
 
MexicoKaren's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Bucerias, Nayarit, Mexico
Posts: 1,914
I'm with GB - I have no problem being honest with people and saying something like "I've really enjoyed our visit, but I/we really need to get some sleep." But having said that, I am remembering a friend up north who was the same way - he finally had to be asked very bluntly to go home. He came down here to visit us about a year ago...never again.
__________________
Saludos, Karen
MexicoKaren is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2008, 09:26 PM   #20
Traveling Welcome Wagon
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Somewhere, US
Posts: 15,716
Someone I talked to once (or maybe it was something they read) had a guest who wouldn't take a hint (yawning, looking at the clock, saying things about work, etc.). They finally stood up, handed the guest the TV remote and said, "We have to be up early for work. Don't forget to lock up when you leave."

Barbara
__________________

Barbara L is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off





All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:11 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
×