Old Venting Thread

[Half Baked]

What is the etiquette for returning wedding gifts if the bride and groom break up?

Is there a time limit?

This bride and groom lasted 1 month and 2 days.

edited: I'm not waiting for a gift to be returned. I may have to help them send all the presents back. I just really believe that the effort should be made. Does anyone else have a view on this?

 

[pdswife]

I think they should be returned...

It's sad....

 

[Katie H]

Heck, yes, they should be returned.

 

[Half Baked]

This surprised the heck out of me and I really disagree! I was checking it out on the internet. I bet the couple doesn't give it a thought but hopefully they'll surprise me.

en.allexperts.com/q/Divorce-Issues-1626/Returning-wedding-gifts-Marriage.htm - 19k -

Question

My Co worker and her husband seperated after 10 months. We wanted to know if the Wedding gifts should be returned? Is there a time limit on how long a marriage must last? She said her marriage really started going sour 3 months after the wedding but she hung in there. Her husband has taken all the wedding gifts some were never used and still in boxes. We think they should be returned. Especially the ones that were given to her at our office bridal shower. We didn't know the groom and most gifts were addressed to her. Before the divorce goes thru we'd appreciate an answer. Thank you


Answer

It's custom to keep the wedding gifts that were given to the couple. The only way they should be returned is if the marriage doesn't happen,and is called off. Then it would be etiquette to return the gifts.

 

[Katie H]

It may seem surprising, but I still say they should be returned. It's almost as though he/she is being rewarded (perhaps not the right word, but what I could think of at the moment) for throwing a big party and living together for a few weeks.

This might be a question best posed to Emily Post or Miss Manners. I have a Miss Manners book. I'll look through it and see if this issue is addressed.

 

[Michelemarie]

How sad is that? I bet after that, though, the gifts are the last thing on that couple's mind. So sad.

 

[buckytom]

since my wife's remaining family is in slovakia, we eloped, and never got any wedding gifts.

so you should send them to us...

 

[Half Baked]

I hate cable companies. Comcast called me, telling that they are switching everybody to digital voice, whatever that might be. Ok, fine do it. After they came and change everything I do not have food network. It really is stupid, because this is the only chanel I like to watch. I, guess, they changed some kind of packaging, darn. So no to get food network I'd have to pay 3 times more. Darn.

Can you change back?

Mr HB's son asked me to sit at his house and wait for Comcast yesterday (do you hear the foreboding music?). They were to be there between 11am-2pm. Being the responsible person I am, I was there at 10:30.

-OK, at 1:15 pm Comcast called and said they were running late and would be there between 1:30 and 3:30.
-At 4pm, I call the boy (lol, 33) and ask him to find out what's going on. He was horrified that I was still there. He called and they said the technician was on his way to the house.
- At 6pm, I call the boy and say I'm going home.
-He calls me when I get home and says he called Comcast and the technician said he was there and did his work. No, this wasn't something that he could have fixed through the outdoor box. In fact, they insisted that someone be there since they HAD to get inside.

 

[LEFSElover]

Just off the phone with a dear friend who told me of the Ma'am thread. I did not know a venting forum existed or I would have been posting solely here.

The Ma'am verbiage is understood probably by where you were raised. Being raised in Santa Monica all my life, {California} I didn't know of the Ma'am thing [only that to me and as I was raised to understand] it was used out of respect. Nothing about age at all. You said it due to the respect for the person you were speaking to. So in my useage of it, it's been to young lady's and not so young lady's, either way, < they're lady's. That's my take on it.

Over the years, it's been taught to me that some feel it has to do with age. I'll stick to my useage, due respect.

My vent is over nothing, today, it's a good day. Peaceful days to all of you and quiet nights too...​

 

[luvs]

noise. noise agitates me till i want to....... ughhhhhhh!

 

[VickiQ]

I have just one word to say
****SCREAM****
With that I wish you all love and energy,
Vicki
things have been a little rough-sorry

 

[Alix]

You Ok Vicky?

 

[VickiQ]

Thank you Alix- I will be fine. There is just alot going on here.Between my son's wedding and my father's 80th surprize party next week and there being so many broken things I just can't fix- there's alot of HIGH emotions among the crowd. Thank you again.Love and energy, Vicki

 

[Alix]

Ah! I understand that perfectly Vicky. When its all done, go sit in your garden and have a nice cup of tea and celebrate all by yourself.

 

[love2"Q"]

dust from sanding will not ruin the finish on your
cabinets ... ahhh .. that feels better ..

 

[buckytom]

and my father's 80th surprize party next week

geez vicki, you'da thought he'd catch on by the 2nd or 3rd time all of the cars were parked in front of the house.

but, i guess if you live that long, you deserve 80 parties.

good luck and congrats on your son's wedding. relax and enjoy it. there'll be lots of love and energy around you from your family, so grab some for yourself.

and love2q, it does if you forget to clean it off before staining or sealing. use an old tooth brush to remove it from corners and little spaces.

 

[kadesma]

Arggggh,
My DH, since he retired goes to the coffee shop each morning after breakfast and has coffee and a gab fest with some of his cronies..He enjoys it, I enjoy the quiet time so that is fine. BUT,today I left for the grocery shopping early as I had more to do for tomorrow..When I got home, several cars were pulling out of the drive..I carry in the groceries, and my kitchen is upside down and inside out..Seems the fellows were wanting to have a taste of some of the things for tomorrow.Yep a taste, Well they about cleaned out the potatoe salad, Now I'm making more,ate the whole tray of fruit, all the salami cheese, crackers for the coming week for the kids, made coffee, 3 pots, all the baguette sor tomorrow,,,So not only did I have to return to the store, I had to remake the fruit tray, potatoe salad and re-buy things for next week..Then before I could start any of this, I had to re-load the dish washer, turn off the oven, they wanted to make ceese, salami on the baguette..Right now, I'm still at KILL mode..DH, was happy as a clam feeding his buddies, one of the last to leave remarked that DH sure was a fine cook!!!!!!!! OH yes, the final smack in the face, WE invited several of the widowers over tomorrow so they wont be alone...
Now, guess who just asked whats for dinner? Think I should tell him?
kadesma

 

[SurvivorGirl]

Gosh I hate the dentist (sorry to any dentists that we have at DC, it's not the person, it's just..ugh!!) !!!
Went there a couple of weeks back and they say that I have a cavity (never had one before) and that I have to go back and get it filled.
I completely freak out when I go there anyway and now they have to numb my mouth and fill a tooth (or whatever they do while they're in there ).
god It makes me shudder just to think about going there
anyone have any suggestions on what to do to take your mind off where you are? i've heard of bringing in an mp3 or something like that.

 

[Katie H]

Sweetheart, just chill and try to relax. You might be in only a few minutes. It all depends on how extensive the filling will be. You say you haven't had to have a filling before, so chances are your visit will be quite problem free.

Just keep brushing and flossing regularly and you will avoid further filling experiences.

 

[SurvivorGirl]

You say you haven't had to have a filling before, so chances are your visit will be quite problem free.

gosh I hope so!!
thx!