Should cooking be considered a chore, if you enjoy it ??

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larry_stewart

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An occasional argument in the Larry residence is about chores. She cleans the house and does the laundry. I do all the outside work and the cooking. Dishes , taking out the trash and other things the kids take care of. Anyway, getting back to the point, she will tell me that cooking doesnt count because I enjoy doing it so its not really a chore. My reply is, that by me doing it, she doesnt have to do it ( and she hates it). So, does my argument stand ?? or am I just being an unreasonable jackass :LOL: Which Ive been called before, and kinda like the title.
 

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Rather than calling them chores, look at it as dividing up certain jobs/responsibilities necessary to the operation of the household.
 
I would have to side with the wife... if you enjoy it, it is not a chore. I love to cook and never have found it to be something that I groan about having to do. I remember one night we planned to have spaghettie for dinner. I had class that night, so the plan was to go to class and then come home and start cooking. When I got home, I was sooooo dissappointed to see DH had already started cooking dinner. He stole my joy!!!!! (I was appreciative too... but bummed!)
 
And just to make a point. I have no problem vacuuming but i get criticized on what a crappy job I do ( not purposely ;) ) so its not like im avoiding these other duties. I just dont meet up to the standards she has , as her cooking doesnt meet up with my standards, or even the dogs!!!
 
I guess I could understand that. I do the vacuuming, kitchen cleaning, and dusting... I don't like the job he does doing it. He washes clothes, washes pots and pans, dishes. I'm ok with that division of chores. I enjoy vacuuming to... so I guess that can't be a chore huh?
 
I love to cook so it's not usually a chore but it does seem like one sometimes when I just don't feel like it but it has to be done. Then every step feels like a chore.
 
...and furthermore, if she doesn't think it's a chore, offer to swap cooking for one of the jobs she does!!!
 
If you tasted her cooking, you would understand why i never made that offer.

The suggestion was to make a point, not for an actual swap.

Bottom line, she's complaining because she feels like the work is not divided up fairly. It's not about the cooking.
 
I think it comes down to a matter of survival.
Someone has to do it to survive. Just because one of you does it better,
well, it's still a chore/responsibility.
If the other does any other chore well and likes it
necessary to the
home maintainence, does that mean it's not a chore?
I think not.
But I'd be a J.A. to get in the middle of marital
situations, so forget I said anything.:innocent: :wacko: :LOL:
 
Sorry Larry but that is funny! There is dh, me and ds. Dh is on disability so he basically does NOTHING in the house or out. (he works on our website which brings in money) He is not able to and I understand that. Ds does yard work, sometimes, litter box and garbage detail. I cook, clean, pay bills, yard work, laundry, minor repairs in the house and any thing else that needs to be done. I also have a mom in an assisted living that I have to take care of. I love to cook and dh doesn't know how but I really don't consider it a "chore". It's enjoyment for me. I guess it's in how you look at it. Dh would probably say "it's my job". I don't think he would actually voice that to me because he knows better. LOL
I don't know that I would say you're an unreasonable jackass. I would just say enjoy it and don't sweat the small stuff. You seem to enjoy cooking, does it really seem like a chore for you? Is any marriage actually 50-50?

Barb
 
Its not a big deal, and we havent even had this argument in a long time. For some reason, it just hit me, so while im online i decided to post it to see others opinions
 
larry i feel your pain.

I cook, I clean, I do hear luandry, I do my laundry, I vacuum, I take care of the cars (myself no one touches my autos unless nessecary),

I basiclly do the manly thing and the womenly thing. Im the compelte package. (pat pat pat on my back.

she is very lucky to have me and as your wife is to have you.

there are certian stregths and weaknesses each person brings to the relationship. The key is to finding who likes to do what so its not so much a chore, liek you cooking in this case but equally dividing up the stuff. and like I think it was andy said.

offer to switch. switch some switch all. Show her that you appricate her and the stuff she does but she also needs to appricate you. its a give and take, a comprimise between both parties involved.

She does need to appricate you also.

I know my situation is very and i mean very lopsided but alot of these thing i dont look at chores. Its stuff I enjoy doing (sort of) but I would rather do it. thats just me.


If it comes up dont argue. tell you know she does alot around house and if she wants lets swap some chores.
 
well, for fathers day, I told her the best present i could have from her, was for me to come home from work and see her mowing the front lawn ( something she has never done in her life)

Needless to say, that didnt go over well. Id go into more detail, but if i do, ill get kicked out of the forum.:-p
 
I'm with Andy M. There are a number of duties necessary to make the home run. It is fitting and appropriate to divide those duties among the members of the household. If it is possible to have a duty / responsibility / chore assigned to oneself that you enjoy, great! Actually, the entire family benefits from the fact that you like to cook. I have always tried to find a way to make chores "go down" easier.

I am also with Quicksilver. DC can do so may things, solve family debates is not one of them.
 
Just because you enjoy it does not make it any less of a chore IMO. I am on your side Larry. I love to cook, but that does not mean I always feel like doing it. There are times when I just want to sit on the couch and watch TV instead of cooking, even though I enjoy it.
 
I love cooking and do 99.9% of it. Paul is a wonderful cook though and I love it when he comes in to the kitchen to help out.

Cooking every night does get to be a chore (anything you HAVE to do over and over becomes one) ...so once in awhile ( like last night) I'll give him a little chore to do. It makes us both feel good. He gets to feel good because he helps me out. I get to feel good because I feel like part of the burden gets taken care of that night. Last night he made some noodles with feta. Very easy and something that I could have done but..on a busy night one thing that I didn't have to do.
 
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