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Old 06-01-2017, 07:10 PM   #7761
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kayelle View Post
A couple went to breakfast at a restaurant where the ‘seniors’ special’ was two eggs, bacon, hash browns and toast for $2.99.
‘Sounds good,’ the wife said. ‘But I don’t want the eggs.’
‘I’ll have to charge you $3.49 because you’re ordering a la carte,’ said the waitress.
‘You mean I’d have to pay for not taking the eggs?’ she asked incredulously.
YES!’ stated the waitress.
‘I’ll take the special then,’ the lady said.
‘How do you want your eggs?’ the waitress asked.
‘Raw and in the shell,’
She took the two eggs home and baked a cake.
DON’T MESS WITH SENIORS!
I'll have to remember that next time I run into that nonsense. And yeah, I'm a senior.
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Old 06-01-2017, 07:36 PM   #7762
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LOL - let us know if it works!
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Old 06-12-2017, 03:54 AM   #7763
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Old 06-12-2017, 04:15 AM   #7764
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didn't show up Aunt Bea!
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Old 06-12-2017, 09:52 AM   #7765
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didn't show up Aunt Bea!
Same here!
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Old 06-12-2017, 12:22 PM   #7766
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I guess you'll have to take my word for it!!!
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Old 06-12-2017, 06:34 PM   #7767
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Recently, a group of teens on a nearby, inhabited island, were up to no good. It seems theey thought it was funny vanalizing automobile batteries. They would sneak in late at night, open the car and truck hoods, and pour a generous amount of salt onto the battery top. The salt, was then made wet with a spray bottle. The boys would hten leave to do the same thing to other cars.

When the salt was made wet, it acted as a conduction fluid and caused the batteries to discharge so much that they were ruined. This was expensinve for the vehicle owneers.

The island cops were trying valiantely to catch the vandals and finally got a beak. They followed a lead and caught the boys red-handed. They were charged with, are you ready for this, a salt and battery.

Seeeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
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Old 06-12-2017, 06:36 PM   #7768
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Shocking!
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Old 06-12-2017, 06:52 PM   #7769
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Click image for larger version

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Old 06-12-2017, 07:12 PM   #7770
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A friend of ours sent this to us:

Seasoned Citizen Quiz

Great mental exercise for the over-60 crowd. Which of the following names are you familiar with?

1. Monica Lewinsky
2. Spiro Agnew
3. Benito Mussolini
4. Adolf Hitler
5. Jorge Bergoglio
6. Alfonse Capone
7. Vladimir Putin
8. Linda
Lovelace
9. Saddam Hussein
10. Tiger Woods

You had trouble with #5, didn't you?

You know all the liars, criminals, adulterers, murderers, thieves, sluts and cheaters, but you don't know the Pope??

Lovely, just lovely ... sometimes I worry about you...


I didn't know #5 either
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:18 PM   #7771
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Good one K-girl. I didn't know #5 either.

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Old 06-12-2017, 07:25 PM   #7772
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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?



...a stick!
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:34 PM   #7773
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PrincessFiona60 View Post
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?



...a stick!


I told this one to DH...he didn't get it
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Old 06-12-2017, 07:48 PM   #7774
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneohegirlinaz View Post
A friend of ours sent this to us:

Seasoned Citizen Quiz

Great mental exercise for the over-60 crowd. Which of the following names are you familiar with?

1. Monica Lewinsky
2. Spiro Agnew
3. Benito Mussolini
4. Adolf Hitler
5. Jorge Bergoglio
6. Alfonse Capone
7. Vladimir Putin
8. Linda
Lovelace
9. Saddam Hussein
10. Tiger Woods

You had trouble with #5, didn't you?

You know all the liars, criminals, adulterers, murderers, thieves, sluts and cheaters, but you don't know the Pope??

Lovely, just lovely ... sometimes I worry about you...


I didn't know #5 either
aww, geeze...

Ross
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Old 06-12-2017, 08:08 PM   #7775
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Just Cooking View Post
aww, geeze...

Ross
Ross, did you get them right?
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Old 06-13-2017, 06:56 AM   #7776
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kaneohegirlinaz View Post
Ross, did you get them right?

All but #5.... That was an embarrassed "aww geeze"...

Ross
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Old 06-13-2017, 07:31 AM   #7777
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Originally Posted by Kaneohegirlinaz View Post


I told this one to DH...he didn't get it
It's one of Shrek's favorites, along with:

"Do you want your pizza cut into 6 or 8 pieces?"

"Oh just 6, I don't think I could eat 8."
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Old 06-13-2017, 02:09 PM   #7778
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PrincessFiona60 View Post
It's one of Shrek's favorites, along with:

"Do you want your pizza cut into 6 or 8 pieces?"

"Oh just 6, I don't think I could eat 8."
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Old 06-13-2017, 02:11 PM   #7779
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Click image for larger version

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Old 06-13-2017, 02:16 PM   #7780
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Just Cooking View Post
All but #5.... That was an embarrassed "aww geeze"...

Ross
You shouldn't be embarrassed. You know him by his title, Pope Francis. His name is almost never used. There are lots of famous people whose real names are not common knowledge.
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