texasgirl
Master Chef
To any southerners, please don't be offended, I was born and raised in Texas. And I just thought this was hilarious.
.
The North has coffee houses, The South has Waffle Houses.
The North has dating
services, The South has
family reunions.
The North has double last names, The South has double first names.
The North has Cream of Wheat, The South has grits.
The North has green salads, The South has collard greens
The North has lobsters, The South has crawfish.
FOR NORTHERNERS COMING SOUTH
In the South: If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store. Do not buy food
at this store.
Remember, "y'all" is
singular, "all y'all" is plural, and "all y'all's" is plural possessive.
Get used to hearing "You
ain't from round here, are ya?"
Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be i
nstructed later on how to
use it.
Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying. They can't understand you either.
The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is
the adjective "big'ol," truck
or big'ol" boy. Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way.
All of them are in denial
about it.
The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.
Be advised that "He needed killin" is a valid defense here.
If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this," you should stay out of the way. These are likely to
be the last words he'll ever say.
If there is the prediction of
the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything
or not. You just have to go there.(this is so true!!!!!I think they are giving stuff away..lol)
Do not be surprised to find that 10-year-olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.
In the South, we have found that the best way to grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and call it a driveway.
Have a good day!
.
The North has coffee houses, The South has Waffle Houses.
The North has dating
services, The South has
family reunions.
The North has double last names, The South has double first names.
The North has Cream of Wheat, The South has grits.
The North has green salads, The South has collard greens
The North has lobsters, The South has crawfish.
FOR NORTHERNERS COMING SOUTH
In the South: If you run your car into a ditch, don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive pickup truck with a tow chain will be along shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out of their way. This is what they live for.
Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and bait in the same store. Do not buy food
at this store.
Remember, "y'all" is
singular, "all y'all" is plural, and "all y'all's" is plural possessive.
Get used to hearing "You
ain't from round here, are ya?"
Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be i
nstructed later on how to
use it.
Don't be worried at not understanding what people are saying. They can't understand you either.
The first Southern statement to creep into a transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is
the adjective "big'ol," truck
or big'ol" boy. Most Northerners begin their Southern-influenced dialect this way.
All of them are in denial
about it.
The proper pronunciation you learned in school is no longer proper.
Be advised that "He needed killin" is a valid defense here.
If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all, watch this," you should stay out of the way. These are likely to
be the last words he'll ever say.
If there is the prediction of
the slightest chance of even the smallest accumulation of snow, your presence is required at the local grocery store. It doesn't matter whether you need anything
or not. You just have to go there.(this is so true!!!!!I think they are giving stuff away..lol)
Do not be surprised to find that 10-year-olds own their own shotguns, they are proficient marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.
In the South, we have found that the best way to grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it and call it a driveway.
Have a good day!
