I am writing this because I feel it is time for some closure. I am sure many of you have realized by now that I haven't been around and I wanted to clear up the reasons why.
It was not, as some may have thought, because of some cracks made regarding mistakes in one of my recipes. That was just sort of the straw that broke the camel's back so to speak, but it would have happened around the same time anyway.
I have suffered from varying degrees of chronic pain for almost 20 years. And through all this time I have deluded myself that I was handling it well. The truth is I was not handling it at all, but trying to just push it out of the way and get on with my life. The fact that I also suffered from depression and other illnesses would probably come as no surprise.
Around the time that I left DC I was trying to cope with severe asthma, the chronic pain, stress from my Dad's illness and several other things going on in our lives. I was using DC as a distraction but there was stress happening here as well and I was feeling like I couldn't keep up as a moderator or a member.
I finally had to admit that I was not handling my pain and low and behold the day after I did this I got a call from a pain clinic at one of the Vancouver Hospitals....I had been on the waiting list for 2 years! It is one of the best in North America. I went for an assessment and found out that I wasn't a hopeless case, that there was much that could be done for me. But I knew I needed to make some drastic changes in my life.
I have been attending a chronic pain workshop for the last month (2 more weeks to go) and it is amazing. I have started what will be a very long process to get me off most if not all my pain medication and am on another wait list for an 8 week day program at the pain clinic which incorporates full self-management techniques.
But to do all of this I need to devote most of my time to getting better. I am not an addict but am tired of taking medications that affect my moods, sleep, etc but don't take away the pain. I am learning that I must carefully organize my time so that I do not do too much of any one thing as not to tire or get sore. One of these is sitting at the computer. Another is standing in the kitchen. I am arranging meals so that I can do prep in stages and it is so much better but at the moment a lot of all of it is trial and error.
I miss you all terribly. But I owe it to myself and my family to get better and if that means giving up regular attendance here then I am afraid that is what I need to do. Since I already am seeing great improvement, I know it is the right decision.
I will keep myself subscribed to this thread in case you want to answer, but don't feel you have to. I just felt I needed to let you know I hadn't taken off in a huff.
Love and hugs,
Laurie
It was not, as some may have thought, because of some cracks made regarding mistakes in one of my recipes. That was just sort of the straw that broke the camel's back so to speak, but it would have happened around the same time anyway.
I have suffered from varying degrees of chronic pain for almost 20 years. And through all this time I have deluded myself that I was handling it well. The truth is I was not handling it at all, but trying to just push it out of the way and get on with my life. The fact that I also suffered from depression and other illnesses would probably come as no surprise.
Around the time that I left DC I was trying to cope with severe asthma, the chronic pain, stress from my Dad's illness and several other things going on in our lives. I was using DC as a distraction but there was stress happening here as well and I was feeling like I couldn't keep up as a moderator or a member.
I finally had to admit that I was not handling my pain and low and behold the day after I did this I got a call from a pain clinic at one of the Vancouver Hospitals....I had been on the waiting list for 2 years! It is one of the best in North America. I went for an assessment and found out that I wasn't a hopeless case, that there was much that could be done for me. But I knew I needed to make some drastic changes in my life.
I have been attending a chronic pain workshop for the last month (2 more weeks to go) and it is amazing. I have started what will be a very long process to get me off most if not all my pain medication and am on another wait list for an 8 week day program at the pain clinic which incorporates full self-management techniques.
But to do all of this I need to devote most of my time to getting better. I am not an addict but am tired of taking medications that affect my moods, sleep, etc but don't take away the pain. I am learning that I must carefully organize my time so that I do not do too much of any one thing as not to tire or get sore. One of these is sitting at the computer. Another is standing in the kitchen. I am arranging meals so that I can do prep in stages and it is so much better but at the moment a lot of all of it is trial and error.
I miss you all terribly. But I owe it to myself and my family to get better and if that means giving up regular attendance here then I am afraid that is what I need to do. Since I already am seeing great improvement, I know it is the right decision.
I will keep myself subscribed to this thread in case you want to answer, but don't feel you have to. I just felt I needed to let you know I hadn't taken off in a huff.
Love and hugs,
Laurie
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. I do fully understand and support your reason for leaving and it gives me a further insight into your character that you penned the missive above.
