When dining out...

[velochic]

I had some questions of what others thought in regards to table reservations and how long you dine.

If you have made a reservation for a table at a restaurant, is that table "yours" for the rest of the evening?

What if you've made an early dinner reservation... say 7PM and it's a special "date night" with your significant other or some other special occasion? Do you think it would be okay, as long as you are still ordering and S.L.O.W.L.Y eating and drinking, to remain at the table for say, 3 or 4 hours (or until closing)?

How do you react, when (if) the maître d'(hôtel) were to approach you and ask you to finish your meal (or giving really strong hints), as there is another booking you are keeping waiting?

For lesser fine dining, if you just walk into a restaurant and you want a leisurely meal that lasts a couple of hours and the waitress gets huffy about it after a bit, what do you do?

I've run across this in America every once in a while, but never abroad. Sometimes, when dh and I have a rare night to ourselves, we don't want a dinner and a movie or a dinner and dancing... we just want a nice, long, relaxing dinner where we can order our courses leisurely. The meal is the whole "date". More and more often, though, we're running into the attitude that after an hour we're no longer welcome. Give the darn tip and move on.

We're not card-carrying "Slow Food Movement" members, but feel that when we can, we should, take our time when out.

What are your thoughts on it? Is the table yours for the evening or should you give it up? FTR, in these cases, we not only factor in the bill when giving a tip, but what the overall per-hour rate for the server would be, so they are not getting short-changed any by having us there... unless they get huffy.

I don't think there are any right or wrong answers to this and it can probably go both ways - just wondering what others think. I'm sure there are some "behind-the-scenes" restaurant issues to this that I'm not thinking about as the patron.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

The restaurant is expecting to turn that table over every 45 - 60 minutes. Unless you are spending the equivalent of a full meal for two for each hour, you are messing with their bottom line.

With that being said...I believe it is your table until you are ready to leave.

 

[Robo410]

When making a reservation before theatre, I'll let the maitre d' know we have a curtain to make. That gives several messages such as we'll be done by 7:30 and need to be done by then.
If making a reservation for a long slow meal, I'll tend to make it late, say 7:30 or 8 and expect to be there to the end.
If making an early reservation, I expect the restaurant to want to turn the table.

 

[Kayelle]

I think a 45-60 min. time line for an upscale expensive restaurant isn't reasonable, although they may want that, it's not going to happen in my world. A three hour date night sounds more like it.
An ordinary restaurant, ok, that sounds about right.

I agree the bottom line, is the table is yours until you choose to leave, certainly if you are continuing to eat and drink.

Interesting subject, velochic....I'm sure there will be many responses.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

I think a 45-60 min. time line for an upscale expensive restaurant isn't reasonable, although they may want that, it's not going to happen in my world. A three hour date night sounds more like it.
An ordinary restaurant, ok, that sounds about right.

I agree the bottom line, is the table is yours until you choose to leave, certainly if you are continuing to eat and drink.

Interesting subject, velochic....I'm sure there will be many responses.

I completely agree...but that is what they wish for, even if it does take you 20-30 minutes to get your meal.

Personally, if waitstaff gets huffy with me, it takes me much longer to chew and digest...

 

[Kayelle]

Personally, if waitstaff gets huffy with me, it takes me much longer to chew and digest...

Haa Haa.....so it's not just me? That's when I get all "Ms. Manners" and chew each bite 10 times, dabbing my napkin to the corners of my mouth, and carefully folding the napkin back into my lap, preparing ever so carefully for the next morsel.

 

[FrankZ]

Has anyone ever sent food back because it was too soon? I have. Sometimes I like to spend some time eating a course before the next one comes, and sometimes the restaurant wants to push you through the meal.

I don't feel as bad for the restaurant when lingering, but you have to remember the wait staff needs the turn over as well, or they don't make any, or much, money. Of course I do expect them top provide good service, but if they do you may want to tip a little more when you spend considerably more time at the table.

 

[Andy M.]

In an upscale restaurant, there shouldn't be any time limit expectations. You're there to savor the fine dining and carefully prepared meal. I'm sure table turnover times for an upscale place are a lot longer than 45-60 minutes. And remember, any turnover rate is an average.

For lower cost and chain restaurants, you get your food faster and they don't expect you to stay. A 45-60 minute turnover makes more sense there.

I've been rushed and cannot abide it. We often manage dinner times by ordering one course at a time.

 

[PrincessFiona60]

I admit, I may not have ever eaten in what you folks are calling an Upscale Restaurant...for me it's upscale if the napkins are cloth.

 

[Kayelle]

Frank, velochic said this:

in these cases, we not only factor in the bill when giving a tip, but what the overall per-hour rate for the server would be, so they are not getting short-changed any by having us there... unless they get huffy.

I think that's very generous and thoughtful, frankly not something I would have thought of considering a normal tip for an expensive meal.

 

[velochic]

First of all, I wanted to reiterate that the waiter is NOT going to get the short end of the stick in this situation. I already mentioned that.

It's more about being rushed through a meal. When is it okay to be rushed in a restaurant?

So, it sounds like if it's, say, a steakhouse, where the meal runs you $100 for 2 people, people are leaning toward it being okay to kind of rush you along. If it's fine dining and you're spending upwards of $200, $300 or more for the evening, then it's not okay to rush you along. Or maybe not that it's okay/not okay, but it can be expected/is not expected.

How much do you have to spend for them to let you have the table for the evening, though? Is it about how much you spend?

BTW, I'm not talking about places like Applebee's or Outback Steakhouse. Not chain restaurants that serve the freeze & fry foods. I realize that people probably are not going to choose that as a destination restaurant, anyway.

 

[pacanis]

When I used to have "date nights" and wanted to spend leisurely time in the dining room, rather than going to the lounge to continue our evening out, I would make a later reservation, in the 8:30 range. That way I figured they knew I was the last meal at that table. I have never felt rushed no matter where or when I ate though. That's just plain rude.
Wait, I take that back. If I am eating a late lunch and am inbetween shifts I've gotten that hurried service from the first shift waitress.

 

[Kayelle]

It's more about being rushed through a meal. When is it okay to be rushed in a restaurant?

My answer is it's never ok to be rushed in a restaurant.....it's not only rude, but they will not get my return business, let alone generous tip. And by the way, I consider a $100 meal for two a date night.

 

[PattY1]

So, it sounds like if it's, say, a steakhouse, where the meal runs you $100 for 2 people, people are leaning toward it being okay to kind of rush you along. If it's fine dining and you're spending upwards of $200, $300 or more for the evening, then it's not okay to rush you along. Or maybe not that it's okay/not okay, but it can be expected/is not expected.

You people are way out of my league.

 

[pacanis]

You people are way out of my league.

I was hoping that included the bar bill

 

[babetoo]

i won't gulp my food for anyone. especially if we are a large group with a huge bill. doesn't matter to me where we are. as a family we had thanksgiving at marie callendars. not only was the food just awful but they tried rushing us. brought dessert in the middle of main course. we stayed put and because of the food and the rush, didn't leave much of a tip. as far as restaurants go, i feel they are there to feed people. if they don't make enough money maybe they should re examine the food and service. i am a meanie huh?

 

[taxlady]

Doesn't it also depend on how busy the restaurant is?

 

[LindaZ]

For special dinners that require reservations, since I'm the one making them, I will always ask if there is a time limit on the table and explain that it is a special occasion and we might be there a while. There is usually a good tip at the end, and I've never had problems with service or waitstaff. Of course, we don't eat out at reservation type restaraunts all that much - most of the time it's called - "Call ahead seating..."

 

[Kathleen]

It does not matter to me whether I'm at a fine restaurant or the local diner: I feel like the table is mine until I am ready to leave. That being said, I am a generous tipper when I linger if the staff continues to check on me and ensures I feel welcome to linger.

There have been times where we have gone to Sport's Bars to watch a game. We will have lunch/dinner and linger during the game. The meal is not especially expensive and I have tipped the cost of the bill before because the wait staff has made me feel it is fine to linger.

If I feel I am being treated rudely, I'll ask to see a manager. If I do not get satisfaction (which is exceptionally rare,) I will not return and will tell those I know about the experience.

I've never had an upscale restaurant rush me along except with the timing of the food. Frank has no issue asking them to slow things down or refusing the next course if they continue. Then...again, a word to the manager usually resolves the issue.

~Kathleen

 

[Nicholas Mosher]

We often manage dinner times by ordering one course at a time.

This is the key. I do this as a matter of standard practice.

We'll order drinks and appetizers, and then I tell the waitstaff to return the menus/wine-list when we finish our appetizers. Naturally there is another pause while dinner is cleared before we order coffee and dessert. Same goes for a digestif... when the coffee is gone I order.