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Old 05-19-2011, 06:51 PM   #251
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My deepest sympathies on the loss of your beloved husband.
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Old 05-20-2011, 11:28 AM   #252
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Beth, I am so sorry for your loss,I know it dosen't seem like but it will get easier with time, I have been there before. May God Bless you.

Josie
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Old 05-20-2011, 10:50 PM   #253
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I am one of you prayer reinforcements. You don't know me particularly; I joined DC a few months ago, but your story and your generosity in sharing it touched me. I am praying for you. My husband died suddenly just over 3 years ago, so I have some inkling of what you are going through.
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Old 05-24-2011, 12:53 PM   #254
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Beth, my thoughts are with you.
How are you doing? God Bless, Bliss
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Old 05-26-2011, 04:29 PM   #255
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Thank you all for your words of comfort.

How am I doing? It changes by the day. It is actually getting worse for me. Rich died one week ago today and the reality of his absence is slowly dawning on me. I am quite busy with duties around the house and grounds, and have just started the paperwork trail regarding his death. I don't have a death certificate yet, so activities will pick up when I receive that. I am blessed to have so many family members who have various specialties. I will start working with a cousin who just passed his test to be a Certified Financial Planner, is that luck or what ?

This grief thing is a long process. I am enrolled in a 6 week grief support group that starts June 30th. That seems so far away, but grief support groups are rare in my area. This one is an hour drive for me. I have a lot of grief type work to do; this is not an easy thing to go through. I just wish time would pass more quickly and I would not be so sad.

Family and friends have been very helpful and call daily.
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Old 05-26-2011, 04:38 PM   #256
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Beth: I hate to say it, but it does get worse before it gets better.

In the Jewish religion, we expect the Grief Process to take at least one full year. That doesn't mean one goes around in sackcloth and ashes, tearing one's hair and muttering, "Oh, Woe is Me," but that one should allow oneself to take the time to feel sad, cry, whatever, and to realize there is not a date when one should feel "fine" again (whatever "fine" is).

I don't expect you will ever stop missing him, but the intensity of it does lessen over time. Lots of time.

Be good to yourself, and find folks who will just listen to you, or just sit there in the same room. Try to find some new activities. Sometimes they can help lift you up. The Grief Group is a very good idea. I recommend it.

If there's ever anything I can do, or if you want to talk, feel free to contact me.
xoxo
June
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Old 05-26-2011, 05:14 PM   #257
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Beth: I hate to say it, but it does get worse before it gets better.

In the Jewish religion, we expect the Grief Process to take at least one full year. That doesn't mean one goes around in sackcloth and ashes, tearing one's hair and muttering, "Oh, Woe is Me," but that one should allow oneself to take the time to feel sad, cry, whatever, and to realize there is not a date when one should feel "fine" again (whatever "fine" is).

I don't expect you will ever stop missing him, but the intensity of it does lessen over time. Lots of time.

Be good to yourself, and find folks who will just listen to you, or just sit there in the same room. Try to find some new activities. Sometimes they can help lift you up. The Grief Group is a very good idea. I recommend it.

If there's ever anything I can do, or if you want to talk, feel free to contact me.
xoxo
June
This is worth repeating Beth ~~ We are all here for you!! ~~ One day at a time...Slowly but surely...you will have peace.
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Old 05-26-2011, 06:25 PM   #258
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My dad died 13 years ago and my mom 7 years ago. I am still saddened by their passing but I take comfort in the saying that 'This too shall pass' .
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Old 05-26-2011, 06:41 PM   #259
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beth, i am fifteen years out from the death of my husband. i still think about him most everyday. most of the thoughts are happy as i remember our lives together. i miss him, i wish he was with me. but that constant sense of despair and sadness is gone. you don't think so now, but it will be a long journey. one day you will realize life has gone forward and that you can be happy again. grieve as long as it takes. no matter what friends or relatives think. it is a process you have just begun. you are doing good things for yourself with the group to help you.

babe
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Old 05-26-2011, 08:54 PM   #260
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beth, i am fifteen years out from the death of my husband. i still think about him most everyday. most of the thoughts are happy as i remember our lives together. i miss him, i wish he was with me. but that constant sense of despair and sadness is gone. you don't think so now, but it will be a long journey. one day you will realize life has gone forward and that you can be happy again. grieve as long as it takes. no matter what friends or relatives think. it is a process you have just begun. you are doing good things for yourself with the group to help you.

babe
(((hugs)))

I think that is how you know the grieving is over, but not the loss.
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