sarah
Head Chef
- Joined
- Oct 24, 2004
- Messages
- 1,161
GLOBAL ECONOMICS DE-MYSTIFIED
> >
> >SOCIALISM:
> >You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.
> >
> >COMMUNISM:
> >You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
> >
> >FASCISM:
> >You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
> >
> >NAZISM:
> >You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.
> >
> >BUREAUCRATISM:
> >You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the
>other
> >and throws the milk away...
> >
> >TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
> >You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd
multiplies,
> >and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
> >
> >AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the
>milk
> >of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow
> >dropped dead.
> >
> >A FRENCH CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
> >
> >A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size
of
> >an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a
> >clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
> >
> >A GERMAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years,
eat
> >once a month, and milk themselves.
> >
> >AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for
> >lunch.
> >
> >A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You
> >count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again
and
> >learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another
bottle
>of
> >vodka.
> >
> >A SWISS CORPORATION:
> >You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others
for
> >storing them.
> >
> >A CHINESE CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full
> >employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who
> >reported the numbers.
> >
> >AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You worship them.
> >
> >A BRITISH CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. Both are mad.
> >
> >
> >SOCIALISM:
> >You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.
> >
> >COMMUNISM:
> >You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
> >
> >FASCISM:
> >You have 2 cows, the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
> >
> >NAZISM:
> >You have 2 cows. The Government takes both and shoots you.
> >
> >BUREAUCRATISM:
> >You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the
>other
> >and throws the milk away...
> >
> >TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
> >You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd
multiplies,
> >and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
> >
> >AN AMERICAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the
>milk
> >of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow
> >dropped dead.
> >
> >A FRENCH CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
> >
> >A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size
of
> >an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a
> >clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
> >
> >A GERMAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years,
eat
> >once a month, and milk themselves.
> >
> >AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for
> >lunch.
> >
> >A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You
> >count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again
and
> >learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another
bottle
>of
> >vodka.
> >
> >A SWISS CORPORATION:
> >You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others
for
> >storing them.
> >
> >A CHINESE CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full
> >employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who
> >reported the numbers.
> >
> >AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. You worship them.
> >
> >A BRITISH CORPORATION:
> >You have two cows. Both are mad.
> >