I haven't done bird day for over 25 years, since the last time, 3 days after giving birth to my son, when the horde descended, did not offer to help, but felt free to sit around and criticize the entire meal. I did do a bird day for my dad a couple of years before he died. The others were invited but cancelled at the last minute. Apparently they were ticked off that, acquiescing to my father's wishes, I made a ham instead of a turkey. So rather than one of them offering to bring a bird, they just got pissy and cancelled at the last minute for made-up reasons - but spread the word far and wide that the REAL reason was me "taking over" bird day, LOL! Like any of them had done a single holiday meal for the whole family since I quit doing them, or offered to do it that year, or even to bring something!
I figure he who pays, says. Also the 87 year old guy gets first choice. I don't care what it is - even if it's brats and hot dogs. He only had one or two bird days after that. And actually *I* paid for the whole thing (which they didn't even show up for) as they had bled him dry for the month already and he didn't even have grocery money. No one offered to so much as bring a couple cans of corn. And they STILL complained because when they showed up to take leftovers home, over the next few days, I hadn't made a pumpkin pie, just apple pie and chocolate chip cookies, LOL! How thoughtless and self-centered can you get? My dad didn't like pumpkin pie, hadn't asked for it, they didn't even show up for the day despite saying they would, and then they had the colossal gall to complain about the leftovers, ROFLMAO!