I hate to do it, but...

[Constance]

Sounds to me like she may be jealous of you ?

That's what it seems to me, Middie. She's jealous of me, jealous of the male cat, and jealous of the dog. DH is the only one she likes.

Grillingfool, I have thought of that, too. It would probably be the kindest thing to have her put down, unless I could find another home for her, where there are no other pets and she could be the queen bee.

Our shelter doesn't put down any animals except those that are vicious or very sick. If they can't find homes for them here, they send them to other shelters, Chicago in particular. But it would be very traumatic for her.
It's also very traumatic for me to get peed on by my pet!

 

[pacanis]

You won't find an objection from me on that one, GF.

 

[jabbur]

Just a thought but if she likes DH and is getting back ot you for the attention he pays to you, maybe he's the one who should handle the discipline. If you're the one putting her out of the room and confining her places etc, she may take that as further proof you're the "enemy" and not change her behavior at all.

 

[Callisto in NC]

Just a thought but if she likes DH and is getting back ot you for the attention he pays to you, maybe he's the one who should handle the discipline. If you're the one putting her out of the room and confining her places etc, she may take that as further proof you're the "enemy" and not change her behavior at all.

You can discipline a cat? Tell me how because I've got one I'd love to whack the carp out of for similar reasons. He does not understand that towels are not the litter box. He used to go outside at my old house and his pee habit I attributed to the fact that the towels were always on the ground in our hall (no laundry room) the whole house smelled like cat pee and mold.

Then I moved him to the new house. I've kept the house clean and now he doesn't want out all the time. An acre of backyard and he'd rather sleep on the couch. Well, now he seeks out towels that have been forgotten. I had a towel hanging and he went for it. If he'd go back to being an outdoor cat, he could stay, but if this keeps up, he's going to the same place as Constance's is.

 

[jabbur]

I'm not that familiar with cats. We have dogs since DH is allergic to cats. I don't know if that will work or not but it just seemed logical that if DH is the fave, maybe if he's the one to put kitty out of the room or any of the other things suggested in this thread, it might make a difference to the cat. May not, I don't know.

 

[Callisto in NC]

jabbur ~ I've had both cats and dogs. You can disciple a dog, you can train a dog with relatively little effort. Cats on the other hand are totally different. It was once said, accurately I might add, that "cats were worshipped 1000 years ago in Egypt and they've NEVER forgotten." It is also said that "Humans don't own cats, cats own humans." I believe both are true.

 

[luvs]

place an ad. i got 3 calls after my ad from people interested in charlotte & tig. i owned 2 adult kitties, also put they were fixed, vaccinated & siblings. (before making a decision to give my 2 to my Parents). i miss them, visit on sundays, & we plan fer them to return when a landlord accepts them.
is your litterbox immaculate? if my kitties weren't they'd piddle right outside thier box. excellent jake likes to clean... cause then thier box was tidy.

 

[Adillo303]

Callisto - The way I heard it is - "Dogs have owners, cats have staff". I still love 'em. They ARE independent.

Constance - I agree with everyone that said that it is behavioral. Rather than attempt cat psychology, if this only happens when the bed is occupied with a human. crate the cat at night.

AC

 

[Alix]

Sounds nuts but this works, if you can catch her in the act hiss at her like you are another cat. Seriously. Solves many ills from aggression to peeing. At worst, it can't hurt anything except maybe your pride. Your cat is "p***ed off" at you for something, quite literally. Remind her who is boss in your house and it might fix things.

 

[GrillingFool]

Oh, you can definitely train and discipline a cat. You just have to get inside their minds.
Watch them, learn their communications and use them. Like Alix said, Hissing is QUITE effective if used correctly. So are squirt bottles, cans full of marbles (throw them), and other attention getting devices. Cats learn acceptable behavior from other cats, and they can learn from humans too.

Case in point... my big cat Baxter used to have a really expensive habit of chewing electronic device recharging cords. Replacement chargers ain't cheap!

So I laid one out and hid. When he went for it, Shock and Awe rained down upon him. Hissing, squirting and cans all at once.
Didn't see him for the rest of the day and part of the night, but he's never touched another one.

You can't speak Human to a cat. Speak their language. When a cat disciplines another cat, the disciplined one KNOWS it has erred. Speak their language, in spades!

 

[Barbara L]

Before we went on vacation, our cats would use their box most of the time, but they would go other places as well. They were boarded for a few weeks while we were gone, and now they only go in their box. I'm not suggesting boarding your cat for a few weeks, but maybe what pacanis suggested would work.

Barbara

 

[Callisto in NC]

Okay, GF, I'm on my way to Raleigh with two cats ~ you train them and I'll be back the next time a hurricane hits Charlotte to pick them up. I'm outnumbered and most of the time they look at all the methods you mentioned and just laugh. They know they outnumber me. They rule, I drool.

 

[GrillingFool]

Callisto, I'm leaving town, sorry! hahahaha
Maybe I am lucky, but every cat I've had has been "trainable" in most things.
Course, they have all found me in times of need, so perhaps that has something
to do with it.

I tell ya... watch THEM enforce the rules amongst themselves, and see if that gives
you ideas. Like our old cat, a prissy Queen, allows the young boys to chase her
around in the morning, but in the evening, if they try she lets them get right in her
face, then gives them the low slow growl while maintaining eye contact.
They ALWAYS back off.
So to get the boys to stay out of areas, I sit and wait, and when they try, I give
them MY low, slow cat growl. Sometimes I even give them that hissss with the click
at the end. It works; they back off and stay out of whereever it is I want them out of.

YMMV of course...... it has been said that I am a weirdo geek nerd type guy, so.....

 

[Constance]

Well, Kim blocked of Mei Yu's hiding place behind the water bed. When I went to run her out of the bedroom, she headed for her hiding place and actually bounced of the cardboard.
Then she ran out of the bedroom and I shut the door, so all is well for the present. We'll see if she decides to act up in the daytime, now.

 

[In the Kitchen]

Well, Kim blocked of Mei Yu's hiding place behind the water bed. When I went to run her out of the bedroom, she headed for her hiding place and actually bounced of the cardboard.
Then she ran out of the bedroom and I shut the door, so all is well for the present. We'll see if she decides to act up in the daytime, now.

Our pets always keep us on edge. Just love them too much to give them up! I think this problem helped me make up my mind about getting a cat. The dogs haven't done this so far. My brother's cat jumps on his kitchen table. If that doesn't make me mad. He says she never goes outside so it is okay. How would y ou feel? Almost as bad as going on a pillow! cat urine smells really different.

 

[Callisto in NC]

My cats have the run of the house. There is no kitchen table, it's a laundry table in the new house because of space issues. They are allowed to jump on it, on the washer, the dryer, the windows, the dressers, anywhere they want to jump as long as they don't pee on it when they get there. I had the pee issue in my old house where they did go on my bed. I cleaned it really well and flipped it in the new house and so far, so good when it comes to the bed. Now if Boogity would just stop peeing on towels.

 

[buckytom]

Sounds nuts but this works, if you can catch her in the act hiss at her like you are another cat. Seriously. .

lol, you should see alix at the zoo!

(i think i heard one of the monkeys say "oh brother...we've got a live one")

most cats are definitely trainable. not the the degree of a dog, but you can certainly get them to do or not do things, once you understand their stimuli. a lot of the same rules apply as with training any animal, such as positive and negative reinforcement.

dw has trained our cats not to scratch furniture by carrying them over to the sisal posts, and imitating the behaviour for them to see. if they do it again, she shreiks and shows them over and over. heck, i've learned to do a lot of things to avoid that shreik!

 

[jabbur]

dw has trained our cats not to scratch furniture by carrying them over to the sisal posts, and imitating the behaviour for them to see. if they do it again, she shreiks and shows them over and over. heck, i've learned to do a lot of things to avoid that shreik!

You would do well with my DH! I've trained him the same way! He sometimes says he'll do anything to not have to hear me yell!

 

[lindatooo]

Our Domino has somehow been trained to eat any living plant in the house....I gave up on them and bought silk plants....she ate them too....evidence was returned on the carpet!

She has always been immaculately litter-box trained. She was so very tiny when we brought her home I put a box upstairs in our bedroom and another downstairs in the laundry room. Never not one time did she eliminate outside her litter box even when she was very ill. (Lindatoo puffs up with pride...)

After about a year we realized she never used the box upstairs in our bedroom so we took it out. The very next day she peed on our down comforter in our bedroom right in front of DH !!!!!!! From downstairs I heard him cry "Oh Domino No! No! No!" DH is more the cat person than I am though I love all critters beyond belief. The litter box was returned immediately and has remained there. No further problems. She made her statement. We heard her. We complied. All is well.

But I agree with the idea of your husband doing the discipline and another thought (or perhaps I'm repeating) confining her at night to a small room. They really don't like to soil their dens.

Good luck - please give her another chance!