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Old 06-23-2008, 08:44 PM   #81
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One of the most interesting guys that came and talked to our high school biology classe was a mortician and what I remember most was his description of their final passing exams.....they had to be experienced in moving a 300 pounder of dead weight.......he had every one riveted he was so interesting and amusing
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Old 07-03-2008, 03:56 PM   #82
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It's interesting that people who have posted tend to want cremation and no service. While I have no problem with cremation, I do have a problem with the no service. I will not dictate to my family what to do. It must be something meaningful to them since I will technically not be there! If they want a full blown funeral with viewing etc, fine. If they want something private, fine. Whatever they need to do. Funerals do have a function. We have ceremonies and gatherings for so many of life's milestones. This is just one more. It may seem like a burden to the family to plan and deal with the many details, in some ways, it is helpful to have things you MUST do to keep you going. So my instructions to my family are "Do whatever you want."

Lol. my "service" will involve lots of beer, lots of laughs, lots of stories, and lots of memories. Personally, if anyone wants to, they can donate to their favorite charity in my memory. Why have a service? They say services are for the living, so I want my 'living friends' to party hearty and remember the good times. that's it.
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Old 07-03-2008, 05:41 PM   #83
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Lol. my "service" will involve lots of beer, lots of laughs, lots of stories, and lots of memories. Personally, if anyone wants to, they can donate to their favorite charity in my memory. Why have a service? They say services are for the living, so I want my 'living friends' to party hearty and remember the good times. that's it.
I am with you all the way on this. I like your thoughts. The three day viewing of the body is now a thing of the past, thank heaven. I think it's barbaric and so hard on the family. I don't want to know that people are staring at my dead body for 3 days. Hey, if you want to see me so bad, see me now when I'm alive. After I'm gone, well it's too late.
As for the service, that's fine, but I love to eat and party so if you want to honor me, have a great big buffet and a drink and by all means, have a good time. Remember that I loved life.
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Old 07-04-2008, 12:28 AM   #84
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After going through two untimely deaths of two loving wives I have made all of my funeral instructions "" Immediate burial "" "" as cheap as possible I believe big Fancy caskets are a waste of good money best spent elsewhere "" absolutely no services
absolutely no memorials absolutely no obits. I have instructed my doctor absolutely no resuscitation (DNR) absolutely no heroics. Just let me go with as much dignity as I can and as painlessly as posible. I have a living will and my five wishes posted on my records at my hospital. My step son has all of this information and knows how I want my property divided, and he knows my burial wishes. He has assured me that my wishes will be done. I am covered by life insurance and the funeral home has my police numbers and will git the ball rolling on that score. I have done this to keep any of my family from any more fuss than is nessary. I want to be remembered as I am A pretty good cook a guy who can be real funny. and that I am a caring type of person
after that they can all host a glass in my honor and git on with thier lives. I hope I don't sound cold, but funerals give me the willys. So this is how I want to go .
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Old 07-04-2008, 12:50 AM   #85
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My post disappeared . After having to bury two wives. I have made all of my all of my arrangements. Immediate burial, absolutely no funeral, no memorial, no obit,
I want my family to remember me as a pretty good cook and a funny guy and a very caring type of person. I have a DNR with my doctor, No heroics, Let me pass with a much dignity as possible, and as painless as possible. Burial plot is paid for, my choice of funeral home has been taken care of they have all of my wishes. My step son knows how I want my things distributed and in the next week I will have all of this in legal writing. I do not want to cause my family any more strain than is nessasary
Hope this does not sound cold but I want out of this world as easy as possible for every body .
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Old 07-04-2008, 09:04 AM   #86
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After going through two untimely deaths of two loving wives I have made all of my funeral instructions "" Immediate burial "" "" as cheap as possible I believe big Fancy caskets are a waste of good money best spent elsewhere "" absolutely no services
absolutely no memorials absolutely no obits. I have instructed my doctor absolutely no resuscitation (DNR) absolutely no heroics. Just let me go with as much dignity as I can and as painlessly as posible. I have a living will and my five wishes posted on my records at my hospital. My step son has all of this information and knows how I want my property divided, and he knows my burial wishes. He has assured me that my wishes will be done. I am covered by life insurance and the funeral home has my police numbers and will git the ball rolling on that score. I have done this to keep any of my family from any more fuss than is nessary. I want to be remembered as I am A pretty good cook a guy who can be real funny. and that I am a caring type of person
after that they can all host a glass in my honor and git on with thier lives. I hope I don't sound cold, but funerals give me the willys. So this is how I want to go .
Sorry Dave, but if all you have are verbal instructions with your step son as to how you want your property distributed, you are letting your family in for more grief , heartache, legal battles and more mess than you imagine possible. If you don't have a will spelling out in detail who gets what and a TRUST to see that all of this is carried out without probate costs, you need to see a lawyer and soon. The results of a verbal agreement can be overwhelming, and devastating.
I do agree with you that the fancy casket is a rip off and an incredible waste of money for the family. If you want me to have something fancy, give it to me now while I can enjoy it. I was astounded at the cost of the cardboard boxes that the funeral home uses for cremation. They range in price from 300.00 to 1800.00. The have to be cardboard so that they will burn quickly and completely. And the sad thing is that the family will never see this box so you don't even know if you are getting what you paid for.
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Old 07-04-2008, 09:42 AM   #87
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One thing I havn't seen addressed is the value trusts have other than passing on. Medicare will pay for special care only after depleting your own resources. This happened to my father. He only lived a couple of months in special care, but the bill was over $50 K. This finally convinced my mother, and now she has no money. My brother and I administer for her, and if special care is needed, Medicare will pay for it. This must be done 3 years prior to need. I don't especially like attorneys, but a good one specializing in this field is a must in these situations. Since there is no money left of my mothers, there will be no probate. Taxes have been paid as gifts, and we claim her as a dependent. It is sad that the government has got all of us in a situation where you must go to these extremes to protect assets.
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Old 07-04-2008, 10:05 AM   #88
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when i die, sparrowgrass offered me to come come back as one of her chickens.

i just have to remember to get a seat by the door.
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Old 07-04-2008, 11:43 AM   #89
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when i die, sparrowgrass offered me to come come back as one of her chickens.
Long as you come back as a Rooster and not a fryer ....
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Old 07-04-2008, 12:05 PM   #90
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Thing is I don't care what happens to my body after I die.

If I have survivors and they want a funeral, fine. Its their dime and I'm beyond caring.

The thought of someone waxing eloquent over my minor virtues and accomplishments sort of turns my stomach a little. The eulogy should go something like 'He was a "stinker", he knew it, and he didn't much care what anyone thinks of that".

Consequently I believe the only way to get a crowd at my funeral, if there is one, would be with free beer. But that would load up bladders and without a grave there would be no place for the line to form.
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