texasgirl
Master Chef
pdswife said:ok.. I've venting. LOUDLY.!!!
I just posted under "what was the last thing that made you smile"
My happy news that I GET TO HAVE CHRISTMAS AT HOME THIS YEAR".
Christmas has been hard for as long as I can remember. Mom and dad divorced when I was 8. Mom and I moved up here while everyone else stayed in Oregon. Every year we had to go down for both holidays and it was always a huge fight between mom and dad about when they'd each get me. It'd start a month a head of time and continue until Jan. Fight after fight... All I ever wanted was to wake up in my own bed on Christmas morning. This year I get too!!!
Years pass... I meet Paul and we pretty much do Christmas and Thanksgiving at his parents place in Salem. Mom was always invited. She came once or twice. We'd have Christmas and Thanksgiving with mom a few days before or a few days after. She hated this because it only counts as "spending the holiday with her" if we are there on the actual date. So, about four years ago we started trading off. Christmas with Paul's family and Thanksgiving with her. The next year Christmas ON CHRISTMAS day with mom and Thanksgiving with Paul's family. Paul's folks are very understanding about this and have no problems at all. We miss out on so much though. Christmas eve is one of the most special nights in the family. Everyone is there 25-30 of us sometimes more. Good food, good friends, good times. Mom just doesn't understand. She's invited but refuses to come. So, every other year we miss the party.
This Christmas was supposed to be spent at Mom's house. She just moved in with Grandpa though and there's no room for us at his house, David can't take time off work to drive all the way down there and grandpa has a very very bad drinking problem... SO, a few days ago I invited mom up here for Christmas. She said YES. She sounded fine with it, happy even because she didn't want to spend christmas at her dad's either... She called awhile ago and informed me that "next year will be her turn and she expects us to go to her house" After all she's missing having her Christmas turn!!!!!!!
There's no way we can rotate the holidays at this point. There are too many other family members and people involved. I'm so mad at her.
I know it doesn't seem like a big deal... I did a bad job explaining how painful the holidays have always been. I just want everyone ( including ME) to be happy and I don't think that it's ever going to happen.
Thanks for listening.
T
I understand why your angry pds. Your mom needs to understand that she isn't missing "her turn" you are spending this Christmas with her still, just not at her house. Next year is with Paul's. Hopefully, she will get over it. If not, then tell her she isn't being fair to you and that this IS her year, that is why you invited her to your house. I hope that you get it straightened out. Just don't let it get to you right now, enjoy your holidays. Worry about ticking her off next year