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Old 01-19-2006, 03:55 PM   #1
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Talking Children's Science Exam

These are real answers given by children. (Only children could
come up with this, and keep a straight face!)

************************************************** **************************
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
************************************************** **************************
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants
like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
************************************************** **************************
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
************************************************** **************************
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to
flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature
hates a vaccuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
************************************************** **************************
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
************************************************** **************************
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen).
A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the
abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the
heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O
and U.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.
************************************************** **************************
Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
************************************************** **************************
Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

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Old 01-19-2006, 03:58 PM   #2
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Love them all!!!
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Old 01-19-2006, 04:06 PM   #3
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four seasons... giggle giggle.

Thanks!
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Old 01-19-2006, 10:20 PM   #4
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I like the one about the 5 bowels A, E, I, O, U

ha ha
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Old 01-19-2006, 11:24 PM   #5
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Hmmm...never thought of "benign" in that way ...lol that one's my fav!
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Old 01-19-2006, 11:54 PM   #6
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rofl, these are great gb!!! thanks. i see they've gone canoeing with some of my friends...
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Old 01-20-2006, 12:30 PM   #7
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oh my gb these are too cute !! thanks for posting it !
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Old 01-21-2006, 07:17 PM   #8
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G B , Thanks For putting these on, I ENJOYED THEM !
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Old 01-22-2006, 03:59 AM   #9
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Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.


Duh! Everyone knows the four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard, and Tabasco!

Barbara
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Old 01-22-2006, 04:47 AM   #10
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Quote:
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.
If you think about it that is true Hilarious, thanks GB!
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