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Old 06-25-2013, 01:09 PM   #1
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I Want To Be Like A Poem

I Want To Be Like A Poem
Author: Robert J. Flowers

The sun is shining brightly in an azure sky.
Dave Mathew is playing on the radio.
I pull into the parking lot
and turn the key.
Ingnition is interrupted.
The engine is quiet.

Dave Mathews finishes his song.
I am content.
The car door is opened
to the sound of chimes ringing
from the steeple across the street
It is noon.

I step from the car into the warm sun-rays
Tranquility is shattered by the wail
of an ambulance speeding
down main street, siren howling
And I think
Someone is having a bad day

The thought of my thought disturbs me
I realize that I have compassion
but just a little
for I know not for whom the siren sings
and their plight matters only a little
because I don't now who is distressed

Were it a child of my own, or my wife
were it a good friend, or my neighbor
then I would feel more compassion.
Then I would feel concern.
And I think,
do I truly love my neighbor as myself?

I want to, it is my goal, it is my belief.
I am not yet the man
I want to be, though, I am better for this thought.
I am humbled by this thought.
My compassion grows
for the unknown ambulance passenger.

There is a duality within me.
There is a side who I am,
And a side who I want to be.
At times, I don't like parts of me.
At times, I am better than i expected.
I want to be better than expected always.

It is said that poetry
is the best use of the best words.
I wish to be like a poem,
the best use of the best human traits
I am growing closer
but it is still so far away.

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Old 06-28-2013, 06:05 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chief Longwind Of The North View Post
I Want To Be Like A Poem
Author: Robert J. Flowers...
When I composed this poem, it seemed like a good poem. But after reading it again, several days later, it doesn't seem like such a great poem. I still like the theme. I think it's powerful. But the execution, the cadence is sloppy. I should have let it sit for a while before posting.

Let me know what you think of it.

Seeeeeeeya; Chief Longwind of the North
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