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Old 06-11-2011, 03:30 PM   #781
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yesterday was a day fro he double l. first could not find my cell phone. since i don't know the number tried to find my account at att. after many searches i found a phone number. reached a person. many security questions, she gave me the number. called it twice but could not hear it ring. tried once more walking around the house. under the covers on my bed. how stupid i felt, even went through trash to make sure i had not thrown it out.

baked raisins bar. darned things would not get done. i had set the temp. 100 degrees to low.

made a beginner mistake on dress i am sewing. rip out time.

after hair cut and market, called cab for ride home. they couldn't give a time they would be there and the guy was very rude. called my granddaughter, she said about twenty min. ended up being an hour. was sitting at tables out front with the sun blazing in my face. i had purchased cold beer. and broke one out and drank it, while reading my purse book. that was the only good part of the day. senior citizens moments all day. whew! i feel better.
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Old 06-11-2011, 03:37 PM   #782
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yesterday was a day fro he double l. first could not find my cell phone. since i don't know the number tried to find my account at att. after many searches i found a phone number. reached a person. many security questions, she gave me the number. called it twice but could not hear it ring. tried once more walking around the house. under the covers on my bed. how stupid i felt, even went through trash to make sure i had not thrown it out.

baked raisins bar. darned things would not get done. i had set the temp. 100 degrees to low.

made a beginner mistake on dress i am sewing. rip out time.

after hair cut and market, called cab for ride home. they couldn't give a time they would be there and the guy was very rude. called my granddaughter, she said about twenty min. ended up being an hour. was sitting at tables out front with the sun blazing in my face. i had purchased cold beer. and broke one out and drank it, while reading my purse book. that was the only good part of the day. senior citizens moments all day. whew! i feel better.
Oh babe I understand. It's time for me to start driving again and DH is a pain in the butt. He feels he must go everyplace with me and it drives me nuts.Having to wait for family, cabs, buses is so wretched. I hate it. makes you want to hide. Feel better sweetie you are a good soul.
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Old 06-11-2011, 08:45 PM   #783
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I'm a pretty laid-back person--I don't let too many things get my hair up. BUT, I live 1400 miles from my parents (and am the only daughter). My mom has dementia and heart issues. My dad is 80. He also is on heart meds (and bitching about how hard it is to take over cooking). So I called him tonight to discuss a grant proposal I'm writing for him for a project he did...and I'd like to see as a documentary (all that aside). The first thing he tells me is that he forgot to give my mom her heart meds since Thursday....I lost my mind...I asked him if he was trying to kill her and if so, then I'd take him to court to get power of attorney. And then he whined about the fact she can't cook anymore and he's having such a hard time with that...I put my brother on notice too. I am so not interested in hearing about how my dad forgets to give my mom her meds. I ended the conversation with my dad by saying that he obviously was busy cooking dinner and we could talk tomorrow. Oh. I am so not happy with him.
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Old 06-11-2011, 08:58 PM   #784
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I'm a pretty laid-back person--I don't let too many things get my hair up. BUT, I live 1400 miles from my parents (and am the only daughter). My mom has dementia and heart issues. My dad is 80. He also is on heart meds (and bitching about how hard it is to take over cooking). So I called him tonight to discuss a grant proposal I'm writing for him for a project he did...and I'd like to see as a documentary (all that aside). The first thing he tells me is that he forgot to give my mom her heart meds since Thursday....I lost my mind...I asked him if he was trying to kill her and if so, then I'd take him to court to get power of attorney. And then he whined about the fact she can't cook anymore and he's having such a hard time with that...I put my brother on notice too. I am so not interested in hearing about how my dad forgets to give my mom her meds. I ended the conversation with my dad by saying that he obviously was busy cooking dinner and we could talk tomorrow. Oh. I am so not happy with him.
Not his fault, not her fault, not your brother's fault and not your fault. You may as well yell at the sky for being blue as rage against our parents getting old and sick and in your mother's case...demented. Couple of days, no pills...it's not the end of the world.

We just need to find a system that helps your father. If you feel overwhelmed, how do you think he feels? And now his daughter is upset and he's starting to forget things.

I know it's tough, but you have to be careful how you react to what he tells you or he'll stop telling you when things really go haywire. Now that we see the problem, let's work on a way to help you help them. Hugs!!!!!
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:05 PM   #785
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Yeah--that's why I told him I'd call him tomorrow...and when mom said "this isn't working, we need to do something" I told her I'd think about that. And why I told my brother when I talked to him (we've only been on the phone about 3 hours today) that when he gets the weekly call from dad tomorrow (I don't--I guess my dad knows better--I'd read him the riot act) my brother might want to suggest a few things...e.g., that dad put mom's evening pills on the table when they eat supper...or, maybe set a timer, or that dad adjust his schedule to match mom's (dad stays up until 11:30--mom goes to bed when the sun sets down). I don't know what else we can do...it took three years to get them to use pill trays...we're both too far away to be there to make sure she's taken her pills.
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:06 PM   #786
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First I must say it good to hear that you care so much. I know it must be overwhelming. And working as a CNA(in the past) know what the demintia is all about it not easy. Keep ur head up & everything will work out but no matter just know that im praying for you. Take care!
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:12 PM   #787
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Yeah--that's why I told him I'd call him tomorrow...and when mom said "this isn't working, we need to do something" I told her I'd think about that. And why I told my brother when I talked to him (we've only been on the phone about 3 hours today) that when he gets the weekly call from dad tomorrow (I don't--I guess my dad knows better--I'd read him the riot act) my brother might want to suggest a few things...e.g., that dad put mom's evening pills on the table when they eat supper...or, maybe set a timer, or that dad adjust his schedule to match mom's (dad stays up until 11:30--mom goes to bed when the sun sets down). I don't know what else we can do...it took three years to get them to use pill trays...we're both too far away to be there to make sure she's taken her pills.
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:15 PM   #788
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Originally Posted by CWS4322
I'm a pretty laid-back person--I don't let too many things get my hair up. BUT, I live 1400 miles from my parents (and am the only daughter). My mom has dementia and heart issues. My dad is 80. He also is on heart meds (and bitching about how hard it is to take over cooking). So I called him tonight to discuss a grant proposal I'm writing for him for a project he did...and I'd like to see as a documentary (all that aside). The first thing he tells me is that he forgot to give my mom her heart meds since Thursday....I lost my mind...I asked him if he was trying to kill her and if so, then I'd take him to court to get power of attorney. And then he whined about the fact she can't cook anymore and he's having such a hard time with that...I put my brother on notice too. I am so not interested in hearing about how my dad forgets to give my mom her meds. I ended the conversation with my dad by saying that he obviously was busy cooking dinner and we could talk tomorrow. Oh. I am so not happy with him.
Damn. I am so, so sorry. Of all the other stuff that has happened to you, iceing on the cake. Like you need this.

Taking care of elderly parents, especially long distance, is so hard. My mom refuses to learn how to use a cell phone, and gets upset when I call the neighbors who call the EMTs when she doesn't answer after a few days.

Thoughts are with you, CWS.
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:19 PM   #789
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Damn. I am so, so sorry. Of all the other stuff that has happened to you, iceing on the cake. Like you need this.

Taking care of elderly parents, especially long distance, is so hard. My mom refuses to learn how to use a cell phone, and gets upset when I call the neighbors who call the EMTs when she doesn't answer after a few days.

Thoughts are with you, CWS.
You can just call the sheriff or police dept for a "wellness" check when your Mom doesn't answer. No need for the EMT's.
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Old 06-11-2011, 09:29 PM   #790
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You can just call the sheriff or police dept for a "wellness" check when your Mom doesn't answer. No need for the EMT's.
Actually, her neighbor called the sheriff. She lives in a very small town, and the police, sheriff, and EMTs are pretty much the same folks!

She was pissed as the cop had to break through her screen door. And then he shone a light in her face while she was in bed. I got to hear all about it once her phone service was restored!
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