Marge,
I'm new here and just saw this post. I thought that sharing my experience with you may give some insight or comfort to you!
When I was younger a friend of mine was diagnosed with lukemia. I remember him dissapearing from school for about 3 months before paying our class a visit. I don't believe someone so young can truely understand the impact of something this serious.
Now that I'm older, I can certainly appreciate what he and his family went through and despite all that had happened to him and his family, I was delighted to hear some 10 or 15 years later, with the support of his family and friends, he had completely recovered and continued to develop into a fine young man with a bright future.
Although I'm not a very good at hugs, I'm not really the payer kind of person and I know I could never possibly understand what you are going through. I can say that Ray and his family helped me to realize how powerful a person can be if they are surrounded by those who truely love and care for them.
My warmest regards to you all!