"Discover Cooking, Discuss Life."

Go Back   Discuss Cooking - Cooking Forums > The Back Porch > Jokes and Games
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
 
Old 12-10-2013, 12:41 PM   #5331
Chef Extraordinaire
 
Addie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: East Boston, MA
Posts: 19,074
Unusual pet

This guy was lonely, and decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house. He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar to have a drink.
So he asked the centipede in the box, Would you like to go to Frank`s with me for a beer? But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?
But again there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few more minutes, thinking about the situation and he decided to ask him one more time! This time, putting his face up against the centipede`s little house he shouted, HEY, IN THERE, WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO TO FRANK`S PLACE AND HAVE A DRINK WITH ME?
A little voice came out of the box, “I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME! I`M PUTTING ON MY SHOES!”
__________________

__________________
Illegitimi non carborundum!
I don't want my last words to be, "I wish I had spent more time doing housework"
Addie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2013, 12:44 PM   #5332
Head Chef
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Posts: 1,759
Oh, Addie----- that centipede joke had me falling of my chair laughing. LOL
__________________

__________________
cave76 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2013, 01:35 PM   #5333
Chef Extraordinaire
 
Addie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: East Boston, MA
Posts: 19,074
Quote:
Originally Posted by cave76 View Post
Oh, Addie----- that centipede joke had me falling of my chair laughing. LOL
You didn't see that punch line coming, did you!
__________________
Illegitimi non carborundum!
I don't want my last words to be, "I wish I had spent more time doing housework"
Addie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2013, 04:55 PM   #5334
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,899
__________________
MrsLMB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2013, 05:26 PM   #5335
Chef Extraordinaire
 
taxlady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: near Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Posts: 18,894
Send a message via Skype™ to taxlady
Quote:
Originally Posted by Addie View Post
You didn't see that punch line coming, did you!
That was a good 'un Addy.

__________________
May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.
Robert A. Heinlein
taxlady is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 12-10-2013, 05:27 PM   #5336
Chef Extraordinaire
 
taxlady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: near Montreal, Quebec, Canada
Posts: 18,894
Send a message via Skype™ to taxlady
__________________
May you live as long as you wish and love as long as you live.
Robert A. Heinlein
taxlady is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 12-12-2013, 04:18 PM   #5337
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,899
__________________
MrsLMB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-12-2013, 04:19 PM   #5338
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,899
And then there is this one

__________________
MrsLMB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-12-2013, 04:27 PM   #5339
Chef Extraordinaire
 
Addie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: East Boston, MA
Posts: 19,074
Quit drinking !

A juggler, driving to his next performance, is stopped by the police. “What are these matches and lighter fluid doing in your car?”, asks the cop.
“I`m a juggler and I juggle flaming torches in my act.”
“Oh yeah?” says the doubtful cop. “Lets see you do it.” The juggler gets out and starts juggling the blazing torches masterfully.
A couple driving by slows down to watch. “Wow,” says the driver to his wife. “I`m glad I quit drinking. Look at the test they`re giving now!”
__________________
Illegitimi non carborundum!
I don't want my last words to be, "I wish I had spent more time doing housework"
Addie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 12-13-2013, 09:26 AM   #5340
Executive Chef
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 3,899
__________________

__________________
MrsLMB is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



» Discuss Cooking on Facebook

Our Communities

Our communities encompass many different hobbies and interests, but each one is built on friendly, intelligent membership.

» More about our Communities

Automotive Communities

Our Automotive communities encompass many different makes and models. From U.S. domestics to European Saloons.

» More about our Automotive Communities

Marine Communities

Our Marine websites focus on Cruising and Sailing Vessels, including forums and the largest cruising Wiki project on the web today.

» More about our Marine Communities


Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:10 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 4
Copyright ©2000 - 2016, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.