Thank you so much for those kind words, kitchenelf!!
It makes me feel real good to know that there are people like you out there who can give ME the encouragement to try and help out a friend who otherewise has no other support for him!!
I'm hoping that he'll realise it. That his girlfriend is just a setback for him, and that she only seems to want to bring him down. And yes, he DOES need all the support that he can get!!! I'm with him all the way. He's been getting it from me. He knows that I'm his friend for life. I love him and I treat him as though he's very my own brother!!!
That's part of what being a dear and true friend to him is all about!
I truly hated to have to part with him yesterday, which is why I cried so emmotionally yesterday!!
We've shared some good times together already so far!!
The training program that he's in during the week, had suggested that he check into detox because he failed the breathylizer test twice, which they also said that his urine also had traces of alcohol in it. I helped him get in.
His girlfriend doesn't really do much to help him curb his drinking, like I do, since she's an alcoholic herself. She gets drunk and wants to fight (argue with him or me). This is what I touched on in the post above near the top of this page. That alcoholics get drunk and then their attitude goes into a tailspin and they just start lashing out at the wrong people! If she loves Daquan as much as she says she does, then she should start trying to help him get off alcohol - not contnue to bring him down and or entice him into drinking again. And also, SHE should start trying to get help for herself and stop making lame excuses for herself.
I'm a true friend to Daquan and his girlfriend. He acknowlleges that very well. Outside of going to my new job to sign the final paperwork for employment Tueday, I was with him for the whole time that he was in the emergency room to the time we hugged each other yesterday after he checked into the detox center.
His girfriend was in the same hospital herself for a biopsy that day, but when she was let go yesterday afternoon, nothing much had changed with her!!
She wants HIM to stop drinking, which he should and seems willing to do so now, but she's not trying to stop drinking to excess herself!! So you know how that goes. She SAYS that she'll stop, but both you, myself and others know that action speaks louder than words.
At least Daquan has BEGUN the healing process.
I think and sincerely hope that Daquan soon wakes up and realises that he's just wasting his time with her, gives her an ultimatum and puts his foot down. He should tell her that she needs to straighten up and fly right or he'll walk out of her life for good!!
One thing that a recovering alcoholic DOES NOT need is a mate who is also in the same boat!! That is, if HE is trying to seek treatment from alcoholism, then so should SHE!!
There are much better women out there who would be glad to have Daquan and treat him like a true friend and a human being!!!
Technically and truly, he has no one else that he can rely on but me. I figure that the more support he gets from me, the more drive he'll have to kick his drinking habit to boot!!
And yes, he WILL be estatically happy to see me, as well as me being so estatically happy to see him, and I AM a good friend to him!! This is the first step in helping him get on the road to recovery and off of his alcohol addiction. He needs me for support, and I have no problem at all with helping him try to rebuild his self-esteem, pride and respect.
Four or five days in detox might not sound like much to some people, but it CERTAINLY CAN make a difference between staying on a dependency and becoming a healthy person, and it IS a good sign.
At least he's not on drugs addiction, which would have made it much harder to deal with during the drying out process.
He knows that as long as he's in the program that he's in, and that as long as he's on probation, he MUST stay clean (alcohol-free), or he'll be ordered to go before the judge again and could go back to jail for a month. I don't want that to happen to him either!!!
And once a person who has abused himself or herself with any type of substance abuse, and is on the road to recovery, and they eventually overcome their addictions, giving them the continued support does not stop! They STILL need love, friendship, guidance and understanding as well as any help and support to keep them on the straight-and-narrow.
This is what I wanted to, and should have tried to do for my dear late brother. But at least I got a second chance now to try to help out a dear friend who has latched onto me for friendship, support, brotherly love and guidance, something that he never seemed to have gotten from his siblings and parents.
I will be there there to continually support Daquan through thick and thin, good times and bad - to mentor him, not let him go astray and try to keep him on track. I think he needs me now more than ever.
And I WILL NOT DRINK ANY ALCOHOL in front of him either!!! But at the same time, he MUST develop and maintain the willpower to turn it down. I think he'll be just fine and do the right thing! For I'm really pulling for him and I have faith in him.
~Corey123.