What the Princess and everyone else is saying, simonbaker, it totally true. As I said in an earlier post, I am going through the same thing. Today is 2 months since Dad passed away and the grief just hit me yesterday like a ton of bricks. I received some literature from the hospice society (he was transferred to hospice 8 hours before he passed away) but just kept putting it on the bottom of the pile. Yesterday after posting here I got the courage to call and the lady I spoke to said I would really benefit from grief counseling. I don't know about in the US, but here your loved one doesn't have to have died in hospice to get counseling. It is something to look into.Maybe a friend from church could talk to him, sometimes it takes someone on the fringe to help out and get the grieving person to open up. Sounds to me like your DH is about ready to implode from his grief and he doesn't know how to safely release it. Grief is so very subjective and the person feeling it does not see what is happening around them. See if a friend can help you with this, have him out for coffee or whatever.
I will keep you and your hubby in my prayers. I know with me I can't put a time limit on this....I looked after Dad for the last three years and am now having to adjust not only to his not being here, but to do with my time.
Men tend to push things in more than women, but I still can relate - please give him all the time he needs, but also encourage him to seek help as I am going to do and not put all the weight on your shoulders.
Maybe we can PM if you would like. Sometimes there is strength in numbers