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Your hubby sounds nearly helpless from the way you describe him, Dawg.

Do you have a smartphone? Many of them have an infrared output and apps that you can program as a remote for the TV.
 
Your hubby sounds nearly helpless from the way you describe him, Dawg.

Do you have a smartphone? Many of them have an infrared output and apps that you can program as a remote for the TV.

I have two remotes. Mine and Pirate's. He also has a smart phone. I change the channel and look at him. He is busy on his 'smart phone'! Hummpf! He uses it to change the channel on me. There his remote is sitting on the foot stool. I swear I am going to smash that smart phone on him some day.
 
Yeah, I need to get the Find the Remote app. It doesn't help if DH is sleeping on top of it, though. If I roll him over, it will annoy him.

We have too many TVs and remotes in this house. DH tends to mix them up. Don't get me wrong, he's a smart guy, 3 degrees, good job, but no walking-around (or remote) sense.
 
But years later, we look back and know we did right by them. It's a weird feeling. It's not pride, or a feeling of accomplishment in any way. It was just right, and had to be done. There's no reward for it. Well, not immediate, anyway.

Stay strong. I'll keep you in my thoughts today while I say my rosary.
Thank you. I know, I complain and I will get through this. It is true, being a caregiver for a family member is extremely hard. It took me a month to get over the emotional response when she would fuss or cry--that hurt like you would not believe. But there really is no other place I'd rather be. Today my mom kicked the bathroom door open with her toe. Way to go, Mom!

I hear horror stories of parents' in nursing homes. I don't want my Mom in one. She deserves to be cared for by those who love her. She always is dressed in clean clothes (I don't want her looking as if she's a bag lady, so I am very fussy about her outfits and that she has warm socks on, etc.) Today she wore a Winnie-the-Pooh sweatshirt and red "slacks" (all with elastic waists).

And, I think she gets better food at home than she would in a long-term care facility.
 
Maybe it's time you look into putting your mom into an assisted living facility nearby, so you can get your life back? You deserve to be happy and have your own life. I know a lot of people who wrecked their own health caring for others.

I hope things get better.
Not going to happen. My parents have too much $. The monthly cost would be far more than what we pay to have caregivers come in 2x/day. We may have to get the caregivers in for longer shifts.Or, buy more equipment. I want a lift--she is dead-weighting during transfer.
 
Not going to happen. My parents have too much $. The monthly cost would be far more than what we pay to have caregivers come in 2x/day. We may have to get the caregivers in for longer shifts.Or, buy more equipment. I want a lift--she is dead-weighting during transfer.

CWS, there are two ways of transferring a patient. The first one takes two people. You each place your arm all the way together under hers up by her arm pits and lift her. That method is great when trying to lift her up on her pillow or in a chair if she is slipping down a bit. The second is to have her put both her arms around your neck and have her clasp her hands together. That way you can lift her to her feet easily by her waist. If your father is available at the time, he should be helping with the lifting. If he is able. Or willing.

I can understand his reluctance in helping with the caring of his wife if he is showing it. It is hard on you to see your mother in this condition and with this hideous disease. Imagine what it is like for him to see his wife that he has cared for all these years. He would rather remember her like she was ten years ago. Or the day he married her.

About fifteen years ago after receiving numerous complaints about the care given to patients in nursing home, the State (Massachusetts) decided it was time to do something about it. No more can you tie a patient in a chair to just sit all day. You have to allow them to use the bathroom if they can walk. Even if an attendant has to stay there with them. Nor can you leave them in their bed for the day. And no more diapers. Any patient who can walk should have a walker available to them. And for those who can't walk, then they should have a wheel chair and be able to go by themselves to any area that is safe for them and where an attendant is available to keep an eye on them. If there is a danger of a patient falling, there has to be an electronic pad on the seat that beeps and it notifies an attendant that the patient is standing. At Winthrop where I get my medical care, they have stickers that they place on the back of the patient that is very visible to all. It is shaped like a BAM sign, bright yellow and in big red letters on it, says DANGER!. Many times I have been walking by and see a patient standing that shouldn't be. Her chair alarm is working, but the attendants are not near enough to get to the patient fast enough. I don't push them down in their chair, That's not my job. But I will stand close by until the attendant can reach them. I will pick up stuff that they have dropped. You don't want them bending down. Today, our nursing homes face unexpected visits from the Dept. of Health. And they will close you down in a heartbeat if your facility is not up to snuff. You have ten days to make any correction for minor infractions of a condition that they have found deficient. Major deficiencies get you closed.

Check into the laws covering nursing homes. Just in case you find that you simply cannot take care of her anymore. You don't know what the future holds. Arm yourself with all the knowledge you can gather for the "just in case" scenario. And if you never have to use it, I will be the first one to let you know how happy I am for you and your mother.
 
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CWS: I dont know how it is USA, but in Sweden there are caregiver courses and groups , so you do things right and dont damage your self. Dont you have any more relatives who are alive? If you have, then they should step up for one weekend a month so you can relax. No human can handle to work 24/7 as you do.
 
CWS, there are two ways of transferring a patient. The first one takes two people. You each place your arm all the way together under hers up by her arm pits and lift her.

Please, don't use this method to lift, you run the risk of dislocating your loved one's shoulders. Use a gait belt and get proper instruction on how to use it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_irfJdCL2Dw
 
Please, don't use this method to lift, you run the risk of dislocating your loved one's shoulders. Use a gait belt and get proper instruction on how to use it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_irfJdCL2Dw

Thanks Princess. It has been years since I had to move or lift patients. Come to think of it, I do see the attendants at Winthrop wearing one incase they need it. And any time I had to use my wheelchair in the van, the driver always had a belt. And how I hated that thing! Nothing made me feel more helpless than that belt. I resented even being in the wheelchair. But I was smart enough to keep my mouth shut. They're just doing their job.
 
CWS, there are two ways of transferring a patient. The first one takes two people. You each place your arm all the way together under hers up by her arm pits and lift her. That method is great when trying to lift her up on her pillow or in a chair if she is slipping down a bit. The second is to have her put both her arms around your neck and have her clasp her hands together. That way you can lift her to her feet easily by her waist. If your father is available at the time, he should be helping with the lifting. If he is able. Or willing.

I can understand his reluctance in helping with the caring of his wife if he is showing it. It is hard on you to see your mother in this condition and with this hideous disease. Imagine what it is like for him to see his wife that he has cared for all these years. He would rather remember her like she was ten years ago. Or the day he married her.

About fifteen years ago after receiving numerous complaints about the care given to patients in nursing home, the State (Massachusetts) decided it was time to do something about it. No more can you tie a patient in a chair to just sit all day. You have to allow them to use the bathroom if they can walk. Even if an attendant has to stay there with them. Nor can you leave them in their bed for the day. And no more diapers. Any patient who can walk should have a walker available to them. And for those who can't walk, then they should have a wheel chair and be able to go by themselves to any area that is safe for them and where an attendant is available to keep an eye on them. If there is a danger of a patient falling, there has to be an electronic pad on the seat that beeps and it notifies an attendant that the patient is standing. At Winthrop where I get my medical care, they have stickers that they place on the back of the patient that is very visible to all. It is shaped like a BAM sign, bright yellow and in big red letters on it, says DANGER!. Many times I have been walking by and see a patient standing that shouldn't be. Her chair alarm is working, but the attendants are not near enough to get to the patient fast enough. I don't push them down in their chair, That's not my job. But I will stand close by until the attendant can reach them. I will pick up stuff that they have dropped. You don't want them bending down. Today, our nursing homes face unexpected visits from the Dept. of Health. And they will close you down in a heartbeat if your facility is not up to snuff. You have ten days to make any correction for minor infractions of a condition that they have found deficient. Major deficiencies get you closed.

Check into the laws covering nursing homes. Just in case you find that you simply cannot take care of her anymore. You don't know what the future holds. Arm yourself with all the knowledge you can gather for the "just in case" scenario. And if you never have to use it, I will be the first one to let you know how happy I am for you and your mother.
I understand all that, Addie. It is just so hard and I know my brother would be with me on this, but he is not here.
 
CWS: I dont know how it is USA, but in Sweden there are caregiver courses and groups , so you do things right and dont damage your self. Dont you have any more relatives who are alive? If you have, then they should step up for one weekend a month so you can relax. No human can handle to work 24/7 as you do.
No, I don't have any more relatives. And PF, that is why I am buying a lift when my brother's US funds are transferred to the estate here. Until then, that is the best we can do. But darned right, I am getting that lift, to heck with my Dad. That will be my brother's last gift to my Mom. I know it is wrong to do the two-man lift when she is dead-weighting.
 
Can you check if there any form of support you can get so you get days of otherwise you will crash soon.
 
The metal cutting edge on a box of aluminum foil. :glare: Danged thing bit the back of my hand, right along a "seam line". Probably should have taken a trip to the ER for a couple of stitches, but I'm hoping the butterfly bandage and the three band-aid strips get it under control. Heading to shower soon, so I'll encase my hand in a food service glove and strap it down at my wrist with one of those velcro strips they use to bind up romaine lettuce. Wish me luck! :LOL:
 
The metal cutting edge on a box of aluminum foil. :glare: Danged thing bit the back of my hand, right along a "seam line". Probably should have taken a trip to the ER for a couple of stitches, but I'm hoping the butterfly bandage and the three band-aid strips get it under control. Heading to shower soon, so I'll encase my hand in a food service glove and strap it down at my wrist with one of those velcro strips they use to bind up romaine lettuce. Wish me luck! :LOL:

I hear ya CG! Bummer! Finally after these many years I have given up and bought a box of commercial size pop up foil sheets. It is heavy, and sheets are more than large enough and the edge of the cardboard roll can never get dented in so that the whole width of the foil doesn't roll off. It was a big expense for me, but I was ready to give up any food that required foil to cook with.

If I need a sheet wider or longer that what I can just pull out of the box, I just create a sheet to the size I need by folding over the ends of two or more sheets. No cut hands, no half sheets coming off the roll, no more frustrations!!

If they put the cutter on the bottom of the box, you would have some still sticking out. Enough to grab and still keep your hands away from that dang saw like metal cutter edge. Hope your hands heals real soon.
 
The metal cutting edge on a box of aluminum foil. :glare: Danged thing bit the back of my hand, right along a "seam line". Probably should have taken a trip to the ER for a couple of stitches, but I'm hoping the butterfly bandage and the three band-aid strips get it under control. Heading to shower soon, so I'll encase my hand in a food service glove and strap it down at my wrist with one of those velcro strips they use to bind up romaine lettuce. Wish me luck! :LOL:


My wife has a weird habit of destroying boxes of aluminum foil and plastic wrap. I don't understand how she does it. Within a few days, the corner seams of the box are busted, and it's difficult to pull out the foil or wrap. And then the next time that I use it, I get cut. Every time.

I mean, I sort of expect it now a lot like knowing you're going to scrape your knuckles when you're working on your car.
 
The metal cutting edge on a box of aluminum foil. :glare: Danged thing bit the back of my hand, right along a "seam line". Probably should have taken a trip to the ER for a couple of stitches, but I'm hoping the butterfly bandage and the three band-aid strips get it under control. Heading to shower soon, so I'll encase my hand in a food service glove and strap it down at my wrist with one of those velcro strips they use to bind up romaine lettuce. Wish me luck! :LOL:

Ouch! Is it a jagged cut? The butterflies should work, you can make more with regular tape if you need them.Dry gauze to cover. The butterflies will stay on even when wet, bandaids may not. Wish I was there to do the first aid.
 
I was 55 before I finally found out those boxes have little tabs you push in on the sides to keep the rolls from popping out. I'm always the last to know anything, though.
 
I was 55 before I finally found out those boxes have little tabs you push in on the sides to keep the rolls from popping out. I'm always the last to know anything, though.


I just learned about those tabs a couple years ago! Who knew?
 
I was 55 before I finally found out those boxes have little tabs you push in on the sides to keep the rolls from popping out. I'm always the last to know anything, though.

I push those tabs in, and I've even bought the boxes with a strip cutter on top. My wife destroys all of them.
 
BT, your DW must be a wild woman in the kitchen! ;) I don't lose too many battles with my kitchen gear.

Ouch! Is it a jagged cut? The butterflies should work, you can make more with regular tape if you need them.Dry gauze to cover. The butterflies will stay on even when wet, bandaids may not. Wish I was there to do the first aid.
Aw, love you, PF! :heart: It's a straight cut made by a jagged edge. ;) Himself did a great job of patching me up. Butterfly, covered by a Curad flex, tacked down on either side with a waterproof Curad, all covered up with a 3x4 adhesive pad. Cover that all with a food-service glove, fasten at wrist with rubber-band. Got me through my shower last night and washing my hair this morning. All dry! The cut looks like it's "together", and all I have on it now is a precautionary butterfly and one Curad fabric flex.

...and bought a box of commercial size pop up foil sheets...
Addie, those pop-ups won't work when I'm covering a 10# ham or an 9zx13 cake pan unless I blanket-stitch a bunch of them together! :LOL: Besides, if the plan is to prevent me from getting cut, keep this in mind: this is the first time I can think of that I have cut myself like this on a cutting strip. If I'm supposed to keep myself safe, I'm going to have to throw out every knife that isn't a butter knife. I've cut myself WAY more times with knives than aluminum foil cutters. Heck, I've cut myself with a sheet of paper more often!
 

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