Well, I must say this has turned into a very entertaining Thread.
So Thank You Wan. I know it wasn't your original idea but it turned out well.
So Thank You Wan. I know it wasn't your original idea but it turned out well.
So when an adult woman who may be married with children is looking for a fun night out with her friends and says she's going out for drinks with the girls, that's bad?I will never call myself a 'girl' , I am above 10 years of age. 'Girl' Is something strangely used for women of all ages, yet nobody calls mature men 'boys'. I'm a mature woman, not a girl.
I'm a woman, wife, rebel, 36 years old .
I know no such women, and I don't live in an English speaking country. Here they would say they're going out with their friends for a 'ladies night'.So when an adult woman who may be married with children is looking for a fun night out with her friends and says she's going out for drinks with the girls, that's bad?
Mostly I agree, but I will tell people not to call me a girl. I have done so in the past and will do so if it comes up again. I do not consider it a complement to call me, a woman over 70 years old, to call me a girl. I only think that is a complement when a woman's worth is measured by her youth.I know no such women, and I don't live in an English speaking country. Here they would say they're going out with their friends for a 'ladies night'.
Also, that I personally consider this way of saying things wrong, doesn't mean I correct people who do it. This is the internet where we can write what we think. I'm not going to tell people what to do irl.
I remember hearing coaches calling boys ladies, telling boys that they run/throw like girls, etc…I think some are taking offence at a phrase that is not said in a personnel reference. It is merely a phrase, a saying, colloquial or not, not intended as an insult, nor even in a condescending manner. It is mere said because that's the way they heard it growing up.
In the southern states, "hon" is used so often most people don't even hear it. Waitress' call almost all females "hon". From a baby in a carry to granny.
Even here in southern Ontario, I met a lady in a shop. Shop owner, lady and myself had a 10 minute conversation. As the lady left, she said "It was nice to meet you, Have a good day "Hon".
She was not being disrespectful - It was just a phrase.
Have to admit I am constantly surprised every time some one uses it, I'm not used to it.... but it is just a phrase.
To take it as a personal affront is silly.
This.IMO using familiar jargon should depend on how well you know the people involved.
I find it a bit offensive when a stranger refers to older people as girls or boys in a familiar and often condescending tone but it’s fine with me when family and my circle of friends use such terms.
Waitresses don't do that much anymore - at least not in my part of the South.I think some are taking offence at a phrase that is not said in a personnel reference. It is merely a phrase, a saying, colloquial or not, not intended as an insult, nor even in a condescending manner. It is mere said because that's the way they heard it growing up.
In the southern states, "hon" is used so often most people don't even hear it. Waitress' call almost all females "hon". From a baby in a carry to granny.
Even here in southern Ontario, I met a lady in a shop. Shop owner, lady and myself had a 10 minute conversation. As the lady left, she said "It was nice to meet you, Have a good day "Hon".
She was not being disrespectful - It was just a phrase.
Have to admit I am constantly surprised every time some one uses it, I'm not used to it.... but it is just a phrase.
To take it as a personal affront is silly.
I do agree with you, GG. I think we just "know" when it is something else? I remember, many years back...my boyfriend's co-worker made advances. I don't remember what he said, but it was clear. In my own kitchen, no less. (Everyone else was in the pool...but I had work to do.) Anyway, dear BF poo-pooed it. Said I misunderstood or something. The following month, above mentioned co-worker was fired. Got caught sleeping with the boss's wife!Waitresses don't do that much anymore - at least not in my part of the South.
A man I didn't know called me sweetheart in a store. I told him I wasn't his sweetheart and he got all offended, as if I was in the wrong. Ask yourself this: would he have called me that if my husband had been with me? Damn straight he would not have. It's not just a phrase - there's a subtext.